It’s the unexpected at the Oscars that stick in our minds

Tonight’s Oscar ceremony – featuring films that tackle homophobia, racism and terrorism, to name just a few topics – doesn’t exactly have fun written all over it.

But there’s hope.

Though much has been said about host Jon Stewart’s ability to perk up an audience, it’s really the unpredictable moments that can most make Hollywood’s night of self-congratulation enjoyable – funny, even.

Remember 1974’s streaker? Bjork’s infamous swan “gown” in 2001? Sacheen Littlefeather declining Marlon Brando’s best-actor award for “The Godfather” in 1973?

Fewer stars today seem willing to risk doing something out of the ordinary. And some say that with a lot of first-time nominees, chances for frivolity will be minimal.

“This is the beginning of almost everybody’s careers,” says David Poland of MovieCityNews.com. “People don’t want to mess with this opportunity.

Still, Oscar producer Gil Cates says he depends on spontaneity.

“The unexpected is what people remember about an Oscar show, not something that a producer has prepared,” says Cates, who has produced 13 Oscar ceremonies.

Cates refuses to even try to predict who might be unpredictable.

But plenty of other experts were willing to weigh in. Here are some past Oscar moments that made for fun viewing, and a guess at who might supply similar spontaneity this time:

Naked bid for attention

The history: The 1974 streaker became a part of Oscar history, in part because cool presenter David Niven quipped to the crowd: “Probably the only laugh that man will ever get in his life is by stripping off his clothes and showing his shortcomings.”

Why it won’t be repeated: Streaking is no longer in vogue. And even if it were, the national fuss two years ago over Janet Jackson’s Super Bowl flash shows that some vocal viewers would not be laughing. Besides, heightened security means no outsider is likely to get anywhere close to the stage.

What we could get instead: The closest viewers will come to a streaker this year: presenter Will Ferrell, whose fearless, furry rump made him a screen icon as a streaker in the movie “Old School.” But expect him to keep his tux on.

Political powder kegs

The history: When Michael Moore, clutching his Oscar for documentary “Bowling for Columbine” in 2004, announced from the podium, “Shame on you, Mr. Bush” and scolded him as “a fictitious president” who is “sending us to war for fictitious reasons,” he sparked a civil war in the audience.

Some booed, others tried to drown out booers with applause. Celebrities in camera view were paralyzed by uncertainty.

Moore’s speech was rehearsed – he’d repeated parts of it at earlier events – but the response was not.

What we could get instead: George Clooney, nominated for directing and co-writing “Good Night, And Good Luck” and for supporting actor in “Syriana,” who has taken a few jabs at political figures at other awards events.

“Clooney’s the one everybody would like to see speak,” says MovieCityNews.com’s Poland. “He could actually come up with something really funny, charming and vicious about how both movies fit into the Bush administration.”

Melissa Rivers, who will co-host a red carpet show with mom Joan on the TV Guide Channel, says Clooney gets away with inflammatory remarks because of his good looks and charm.

“He could spit in your face,” she says, “and you’d still say, ‘Take me here, take me now!’ “

The Oscar rejecters

The history: George C. Scott was a purist who didn’t like acting awards and didn’t collect his Oscar for “Patton.” Woody Allen never shows up to collect his awards.

And Marlon Brando – who cheerfully collected his prize for 1954’s “On the Waterfront” – delivered what has become the biggest and brashest snub of the academy with the Littlefeather episode. (Turned out she was actually an actress named Maria Cruz.)

The academy didn’t hold any grudges; Brando got two more nominations.

What we could get instead: The only surefire no-show will be Allen, an original-screenplay nominee for “Match Point.” (DreamWorks, which released the movie, confirmed he would be absent.)

Like Brando, voters haven’t punished him for his refusal to participate in the awards. He has been nominated 21 times and won twice, for screenplay and direction of “Annie Hall,” which also won best picture.

The fashion pranksters

There are fashion blunders, then there are stars who make Oscar fashion itself the object of ridicule.

The most famous example, after Bjork’s swan getup (she even carried a purse shaped like an egg – which she would drop and squat over, pretending to lay it) is South Park creators Trey Parker and Matt Stone. They arrived in 2000 wearing imitations of Jennifer Lopez’s belly-button-cut green Versace dress and Gwyneth Paltrow’s pink debutante gown from the year before.

What we could get instead: Best bet for cornball charm, say Joan and Melissa Rivers: Dolly Parton, nominated for her song from “Transamerica,” with her well-endowed figure.

“We’re praying the hair will be as big as the boobs,” says Melissa.

But as Joan points out: “It’s all so safe now. You’ve got to remember nobody is leaving the house without six publicity people and two studio people.”

The victory freakout

The history: Roberto Benigni climbed over chairs. Adrien Brody used his best-actor win to plant a deep kiss on presenter Halle Berry. Meanwhile, best actresses Paltrow, Berry and Charlize Theron seemed to up the ante on victory tears each year.

What we could get instead: Terrence Howard, whose pimp role in “Hustle & Flow” earned him a best actor nomination, “is the real wild card,” says Perez Hilton, proprietor of the catty gossip site PerezHilton.com.

The Riverses think the pregnant supporting-actress contender Rachel Weisz (“The Constant Gardener”) will be one to watch.

If she goes into labor on the telecast, “that would be a very impressive birth,” Joan says. “That would be a topper.”