Annie’s Mailbox Hubby addicted to online gaming

Dear Annie: Over the past couple of years, I have come to realize that I am married to an 80-year-old man even though he is only 31 and I am 29.

On a typical day, “Jeremy” leaves for work at 4:30 a.m. and gets home 12 hours later. I know he works hard and is stressed, but he never does anything except eat dinner and then log onto the computer. He isn’t looking at porn or stuff like that, but he does play an online game called World of Warcraft. He even plays during dinner. He logs on the moment he gets home and doesn’t get off until 9 p.m. Of course, by then, he’s too tired to do anything except crawl into bed.

We have two children, 8 and 5, and Jeremy never does anything with them. I’m also feeling the big chill. We never go anywhere or do anything , and a lack of intimacy is a real problem. Any thoughts would be nice. – Warcraft Widow

Dear Widow: Jeremy is addicted to his online game. It’s not uncommon, particularly with World of Warcraft, and you won’t be able to wean him off it without his cooperation. It’s become his alternate reality, and he likes it there. (There is actually a Web site for people who have found reasons to quit at wowdetox.com or try On-Line Gamers Anonymous at olganon.org.)

We suggest you remind Jeremy of the “Ring of Protection” he put on your finger. Now that you have his attention, talk to him about what else is important in his life and where the monthly subscription fee could be better used. Then find interesting things to distract him from the game and take a vacation away from the computer.

Dear Annie: I’m the youngest of three children in a single-parent household. Of the three of us, I have the weakest relationship with my mother. If something happens to upset her, I get in trouble. She thinks I hate her boyfriend, which isn’t true, and she has told me that all the problems between her and her own mother are my fault. It is really depressing.

I’ve learned to brush off some of these comments. The problem is, I just started college and want a better relationship with my mom. I live on campus and want to be able to call her and talk about school, boys, whatever. What can I do to finally get on her good side? – Anonymous

Dear Anonymous: Honey, it sounds like your mother has some serious issues of her own, and it has nothing to do with you. It’s possible that your relationship will improve now that you are no longer living at home, but if not, please try the counseling services available at your college. Also, use this time to grow and develop, make mature friendships, and be the person you know you can be. Your life is what you make of it. Don’t let Mom have you believe otherwise.