Stop trying to perfect Christmas and just try to enjoy it

Christmastime? It’s the annual wrecking ball for perfectionists.

If anyone dared to ask me, why I get so stressed out at Christmastime, my uncivilized answer would be, “Well, idiot, just what planet did you fall off of?”

Puh-leeze! Have they failed to notice that it’s almost Christmas? There’s shopping to do, packages to wrap, open houses, special Christmas events, bazaars, dinners, extra choir practices, Christmas pageants, parties and banquet and balls, and gifts, gifts, gifts – where does it stop?

In the midst of it all we have to clean and decorate the house, and hang the outside lights … maybe even go to work, too. (At least we can get some rest there.)

Yeah, that’s a lot, but it’s really just the tip of the iceberg. It’s a juggling act. There’s snow to shovel, windshields to scrape, and cookies and more cookies to bake, plus preparing exotic potluck dishes and hors d’oeuvres trays we so graciously offered to bring. And, these jobs must be accomplished with the time left over after keeping all the regular balls in the air.

Oh, and the Christmas cards. Can we sit down long enough to address them before something starts tapping us on the shoulder, demanding our attention, saying, me, me, me … what about me? No, it’s not the Ghost of Christmases Past; it’s your Christmas grocery-shopping list nagging at you.

If we don’t go grocery shopping we won’t be able to bake, bake, bake and cook, cook, cook for all the potlucks and little remembrance gifts people have grown to expect from us. And, then it’s deliver, deliver, deliver – icy roads notwithstanding. Hurry up so you can get back to those Christmas cards.

It’s enough to cause a terminal case of AAADD – Acute Adult Attention Deficit Disorder, driving its sufferer to paralyzing distraction. And for the perfectionists among us, it could send us running down the street naked, pulling our hair out and crying, “I can’t take it any more!”

You might ask, “How can anyone feel ‘down’ at such a beautiful time of year what with the snow, the beautiful decorations, the spirit of giving … parties and gifts and hearing from our old friends?”

Heck, it’s beyond easy for perfectionists to get “down” at Christmas … it’s automatic. We can’t just bake a cake; it has to be a made- from-scratch, three-tiered, frosted work of art. A cake made from a cake mix, are you kidding? And, the dip has to be the best at the party. A perfectionist couldn’t do it any other way. It’s pathetic.

Everyone needs to realize – perfectionists included – that we can’t possibly do all there is to do, so for crying out loud, let’s cut it down to a manageable size. We really can make box cakes and freezer-tube cookies and it’s OK to bring store-bought dips to the party.

Ask for help at home. Be a kitchen commando, give orders, delegate jobs and mobilize your troops. No troops? Well then, you’ll have to do it all alone, but you’ll have a lot less to do and no interference.

One way around all this holiday madness to start early … perhaps in July? That seems neurotic even to me, but it would work. For sure it’s that “pound of prevention” against the annual onslaught of the Christmas season and an acute attack of AAADD. Every year I intend to do this, but like all good intentions …

Christmas gift buying is the biggest trauma of all for a perfectionist. Because the gift they give must be perfect. The recipient must not just like it – they must love it. To most gift buyers, the main issue is to buy something, wrap it up, put a ribbon and a card on it and that’s it. No sweat. It’s easy and it’s zero stress.

Here are some trauma-free gift ideas for perfectionist: How-to books about curious subjects such as handwriting analysis or making money on the Internet. Foods and wine offer good options, i.e. a pricey bottle of wine, brandy, designer barbecue sauce or fancy olive oil for dipping. Or, wrap a few gourmet food items in brightly colored tissue paper and tuck them into a beautiful Christmas bag. Classy ideas – and easy to accomplish.

Granted, these things are impersonal, but they’re useful and lots more festive than a gift card. Yes, personal items are better, but buying them is to risk major stress for a perfectionist as their very life depends upon each of their gifts scoring a home run.

Perfectionists are never, ever ready for Christmas – but Christmas comes and goes … things that didn’t get done fade away in the festivities and fun of the season. All’s well that ends well.

Take note: Good enough is good enough. Wrap it up and get ready to party, have fun and enjoy this season of love and sharing.