Meals with meaning

It’s a family tradition that has fallen by the wayside. In our fast-paced, overscheduled world – where we have places to be, people to see, deadlines to meet and where even our own children feel pressured to meet numerous demands and obligations – there’s just never any time to sit down and enjoy a meal.

Some adults get so busy that they eat on the run. A breakfast bar in the car, perhaps, then a sandwich gobbled at their desk at work. Dinner, if they make it home in time, might still be warm but eaten while standing at the kitchen counter.

It’s no wonder that only 42 percent of adolescents ages 12 to 17 dine with their family at least six to seven times a week, according to 2003 research from Child Trends, a nonprofit social science research center that focuses on children and organizations that serve youth.

But mealtime is about more than just nourishing our bodies.

According to experts, sitting down and eating food with our families could actually help alleviate some of the problems facing our children today.

“What if I told you that there was a magic bullet – something that would improve the quality of your daily life, your children’s chances of success in the world, your family’s health, our values as a society? Something that is inexpensive, simple to produce and within the reach of pretty much anyone?” wrote Miriam Weinstein, author of “The Surprising Power of Family Meals: How Eating Together Makes Us Smarter, Stronger, Healthier and Happier.”

In comparison to kids who have fewer than three family dinners per week, children and teens who regularly share a meal with their parents and other family members are less likely to abuse or even try alcohol, cigarettes or marijuana, according to a 2006 report from the National Center on Addiction and Substance Abuse at Columbia University. According to the center, the ritual of spending time with loved ones at the dinner table encourages children to open up to their parents and for adults to be more involved in the lives of young people.

Numerous studies, including research that was published last year in the Journal of Nutrition Education and Behavior, also showed a connection between regular family meals and healthy eating habits.

Earlier this year, readers and regular contributors to The Spokesman-Review’s Parents Council blog weighed in on the importance of gathering as a family and breaking bread together.

Nobody objected to the idea, of course, but nearly everyone acknowledged the difficulty at times of having every family member sit down for a meal given the daily demands of work, school, extracurricular activities and other obligations.

That’s why meals have to become a priority, many stressed.

“Make it priority number one,” wrote Celeste Worley-Utley, a member of the newspaper’s Parents Council. “As hectic as our lives have become, it’s very important for our family to sit down for a family dinner together.”

Every Sunday, Worley-Utley prepares a home-cooked feast served with candlelight. The family also sits down every night to talk about their day. “This is a ritual that I would like for my three boys to continue with their future families and to remember that mom and dad made time for family,” she wrote.

Laurie Rogers, another regular contributor to the Parents Council blog, wrote about the creative ways her family serves and eats their meals. Sometimes they’ll have a picnic, she wrote, or a backward meal in which dessert comes first. Her family also enjoys having candles or flowers on the table as well as more informal gatherings with big platters of healthy munchies for special events such as the Super Bowl. And Fridays at her household are pizza-and-movie nights.

Family gatherings at the table also don’t have to happen during dinner time, noted several people. They also don’t necessarily have to take place in the dining room.

Any time your family eats together – whether it’s at a restaurant, at the park for a picnic or in the backyard for a barbecue – is an opportunity for people to slow down and talk to each other.

These gatherings also don’t always have to involve home-cooked meals with all the trimmings or elaborate table settings with candles and fine china.

“Some nights all I have time to do is throw a can of soup on the stove, but even soup and crackers is a feast when we can all be together,” wrote Cindy H. “…The volume around our table is quite loud, but we are grateful that our kids want to talk and laugh with us. I wouldn’t trade this time for anything.”

Mary Eberle, who is self-employed and works from home, wrote about how her family eats all three meals each day sitting down together. “This gives us the opportunity to stop our busy-ness and sit and talk with our children,” she wrote. “We feel like it is one of the most important moments of the day.”

Michele M., the mother of a baby girl, recently established the ritual of the family meal at her house. “I think if we can get started at it now, it will become a habit and something that is expected as she grows up,” she wrote. “…Growing up, we almost always had dinner together at the table and it is a tradition that I would like to continue.”