Dear Annie: I’m a 15-year-old girl with a big problem. A few weeks ago, I did something I regret very much.
After learning that my three best friends had once again excluded me from some inside joke, I got on MySpace and remarked to a friend at another school that they were acting like witches. They found out and immediately turned on me. I apologized several times, explaining that I didn’t really mean it. I said I was just feeling hurt and left out. One of them forgave me, but “Ellie and Caroline” did not. I talked to my mom and told her what I had done, and she said it would blow over in time. She assured me it would be OK eventually because we had been such good friends and I had apologized right away.
Well, it’s been over a month. Caroline lives in my neighborhood, and we’ve been friends for five years. I don’t want to spend the rest of the summer (or my life) without her. Ellie and I were never as close, but I will miss her as well.
Annie, I don’t know what else to do. I think they’re actually getting some enjoyment out of ignoring me. My other friends say they never really cared about me if they were willing to drop a “best friend” so easily.
I completely understand they were hurt by my words, but I was hurt by their actions. How do I make amends, if they won’t even speak to me? – Stay or Go
Dear Stay or Go: These girls do not sound like “best friends.” Of course it was wrong of you to complain about them. However, why are they excluding you? Why are they unwilling to forgive you? Why do they seem to enjoy making you miserable? You have apologized. Now you need to occupy yourself with other things and other people. If they see they can no longer upset you, they may decide to be friends again, but we have to wonder why you’d want them.
Dear Annie: I read the letter from “Paul,” the 29-year-old man who has never dated. It reminded me of my sister. “Dana” is 25 and the female version of Paul. She’s never been on a date. I have tried getting her to try online dating, but she’s not interested. Like Paul, she is reserved and the intellectual type. She has a great sense of humor and enjoys going out and having fun with her friends, but is not interested in meeting new people.
Would it be possible to give her phone number to Paul and see if they “click”? – Her Sister
Dear Sister: Sorry, but we cannot use our column as a dating service. However, your letter should be a source of encouragement for Paul and others who are still searching for that elusive special person.