Hot reads for cold weekend

You never know. But I do.

•Where he’s headed, O.J. Simpson has his best chance yet of bumping into the real killer.

•Just in time to meet the Runaway Zags Goodtimes Express at the station: Robert Sacre, out at least two weeks with more pain in his right ankle.

•Washington fans disappointed with the hire of unproven Steve Sarkisian as its new football coach, take heart. Auburn just settled on Gene Chizik, who was 5-19 in two years as head coach at Iowa State. Better unproven than proven unworthy.

•Joe Sakic’s hockey season has been interrupted further after he tangled with a snowblower, but the Colorado Avalanche captain could return in March after a rehab stint on the Zamboni.

•Maurice Cheeks makes five NBA coaches fired before Christmas, a record. What is this, the newspaper business?

•If it isn’t bad enough that the Pac-10 finds itself affiliated with a bowl lineup that’s the equivalent to the batting order of the Washington Nationals, now two of those locked-in bids – to the Hawaii and Poinsettia bowls – have to be tossed back because not enough teams were eligible. Meanwhile, it’s starting to look like a three-bid league in basketball. Retiring commissioner Tom Hansen must have graduated from the Mike Holmgren School of Farewells.

•All things considered, Jayson Williams’ chauffeur would have rather worked for Plaxico Burress.

•The Kennel Club is trying to upgrade its image at Gonzaga games. It’s added an alcohol-free seat.

•Spokane Shock officials moved quickly to assure fans that af2 isn’t suspending operations, as has been rumored for the parent league. But they may ask players to pay them $200 a game.

•No, I didn’t vote for Sam Bradford or Colt McCoy. I voted for Trevor Wikre, the Mesa State lineman who cut off his pinky finger to keep playing football. What? The Heisman Trophy? I thought it was the Insane Man’s Trophy.

•A source tells me that mixed in among the 4,000 stuffed animals raining down on the ice at the Spokane Chiefs’ annual Teddy Bear Toss, there are always a few X-rated toys, as well. Which conjures up all sorts of promotional possibilities, and a hint at why the light on Boomer’s helmet is red.

•It’s not clear why Charlie Weis is undergoing surgery on both his knees, since it’s unlikely Notre Dame will be in a position to take one at the end of its bowl game.

•Steve Williams, the bag ape for Tiger Woods, calling Phil Mickelson a five-letter vulgarity in a British newspaper should goose Lefty’s approval ratings up there near Barack’s.

•I can count all the freshmen on Washington State’s basketball roster, too. But let’s not forget that it was the senior point guard who went without an assist, the senior center who had two rebounds and the senior zone-buster who went 1 of 6 from 3-point range. Youth isn’t the only issue for the Cougars.

•Though he had the bad luck to play on some truly lousy Mariners teams, Raul Ibanez deserved the same kind of heartfelt adios that old favorites Jay Buhner and Edgar Martinez received. And, no, it’s not true that he signed with the Phillies so he could find a 46-year-old former teammate he might be able to beat in a footrace.

•With a straight face, the Washington Huskies announced the other day that they would not be raising football ticket prices. Also, fans will not be expected to pay for hot dogs they don’t eat.

•I don’t want to say that junior hockey’s regular season doesn’t matter – but when, say, the Zags lose Austin Daye and Steven Gray for a few games while they play for the under-20 national team maybe I’ll actually be convinced.

•If you’re looking for a dark horse in the NFL playoffs, put your money on the Minnesota StarCaps.

•So, the scorecard on former EWU athletic director Darren Hamilton at Alcorn State: fired seven football assistants without telling the head coach, had the president overrule him, fired the head coach, then named in a $3 million lawsuit by the head coach. All since Thanksgiving. You could make a series about the guy, but you couldn’t call it reality TV.

•Tennessee has lost to Gonzaga and Temple in the past three weeks, but I’m guessing coach Bruce Pearl is a lot more out of sorts about his ex-wife opening a hair and nail salon in Knoxville named “Alimony’s.”

•After all the tournaments she’s withdrawn from the past couple of years, I don’t understand why Michelle Wie needed to go to Q school. What? It doesn’t stand for “quitter”? My bad.

•This is unconfirmed, but I’m hearing that Steve Sarkisian’s contract at UW pays him a bonus every time he resists the temptation to blame his problems on the previous coach. There seems to be some money left over for that sort of thing.