November 15, 2008 in Voices

Cleanest loo around? Membership has it’s privileges

D.F. Oliveria Staff writer
 

Handle Extra restaurant reviewer Patrick Jacobs launched a Huckleberries Online thread by dissing the restroom shared by Connie’s Restaurant and an attached Sandpoint bar. Quoth Patrick: The restroom “was so scary, so unclean, and so utterly unappetizing that I nearly told Q. we were out of there.” (On the other hand, Patrick applauded Connie’s food and atmosphere.) All of which prompted my Berry Pickers to compare public restrooms in the Inland Northwest. Charlie said the CDA K-Mart restrooms “need attention.” But Costco restrooms are “always clean.” Ya Betcha chimed in that the Safeway/Neider restrooms “always stink.” MamaJD said that one of the worst restrooms in the county is near Black Rock at Shooter’s Grill. Said she: “I have sometimes chosen not to go there just because I knew I wasn’t in the mood to endure the ladies room.” Sam Taylor, now reporting for the Bellingham (Wash.) News, recalled his days as a 16-year-old courtesy clerk at Safeway/Neider. Part of his duty was to clean the restroom. One day the manager apologized before sending him to clean the men’s restroom after someone had smeared poo on the walls. “I had to clean it all up,” said Sam. “And I’ve got the worst gag reflex on the planet.” Bottom line? If nature calls when you’re out and about? Get out your Costco card.

An effective bribe

How do you get 100 Girl Scouts and their families to rake leaves for Seasoned Citizens in your community? First, according to Family Phil Corless/A Family Runs Through It, you tell them that it’s “a good deed to help someone who isn’t physically able to clear the heavy, wet leaves from their lawn.” Then, Phil continues, you explain the meaning of community to the kids, and how if we all work together, then the world will be a much better place. If all else fails, you go for the deal clincher: “You stuff them full of hot dogs, Rice Krispie treats, and hot cocoa, hand them rakes, and let them go crazy.” The third step worked so well with the Girl Scouts that Phil wondered if it might apply in his house: “Now if I could just get them to pick up the clothes and toys scattered across the floor of their bedrooms.” Good luck with that.

Huckleberries

Poet’s Corner: “Daily drizzle/Makes hair frizzle” – The Bard of Sherman Avenue (“Of Coiffures”) … After one fan complained that San Francisco was abandoning the youth movement by recently signing 30-year-old ex-Lakeland High star Josh Phelps, Chris Haft/MLB.com defended the move on the Giants’ Web site: “Phelps is expected to provide potential depth, and his presence should push the younger players. Competition is always beneficial. Phelps signed a Minor League contract, so he’s not guaranteed to make the Opening Day roster” … Resident George Whitney questions whether the city should be spending money in these tight economic times to pick up leaves, especially when he counted trucks making four diesel-consuming sweeps by his home Dec. 7 … “Sarah Palin interview Post Election,” a clever YouTube video making the rounds last week, features Lisa Aitken (from Pita Pit HQ) as the Sarah Palin lookalike and local Century 21 agents John “Brock Mockery” Williams and Bill “Joe The Plumber” Graves. Berry Picker RalphMouth commented, “LOL, but don’t quit your day jobs!”

Parting shot

You heard about the guy who bought 1,000 copies of the Nov. 5 issue of the Bellingham (Wash.) Herald, reporting the historic election of Barack Obama. The guy hopes to recoup his $5,000 investment by selling the papers for a much higher price. Don’t laugh. Front pages across the nation were being advertised on eBay for up to $499. At the S-R, a guy bought 30 papers at our downtown office. Our big front-page photo of Obama below the headline “Obama Rolls” speaks of the historic election of America’s first African-American. The S-R sold 8,663 single copy newspapers (racks, boxes, retail outlets, etc.) on Wednesday – an increase of 2,421 over the previous Wednesday. Which prompted Editor Gary Graham to say: “That’s a huge number, gang. Most big news stories push our sales up by 200 to 500 a day.” Meanwhile, the CDA Press offered a front-page headline “Yes he did” above the photo of three local Demos cheering at Cricket’s. Dunno if that’s worth hanging onto for decades.


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