Lipstick game innocent? Wink

Dear Annie: My wife, “Nellie,” and I are both professionals in our late 20s with no children. Twice a month, Nellie has a girls night out with three of her friends. Occasionally, they will go to a club or a movie, but most of the time they just play cards.

I recently learned that they started playing a new game called “Lipstick Branding.” Each girl applies heavy lipstick and then kisses another girl on a spot that is normally not visible, like the back of the shoulder or just below the armpit. The kiss is accompanied by the giggling and cheering of the others, with the goal being to leave as large a lipstick brand as possible. I found out about it when I saw a huge red mark on Nellie’s armpit.

Nellie says there is nothing improper or sexual about this game. She said high school girls play it and her friends decided it was a good way to let off steam and bond. Apparently, they have a lot of fun with it.

We have always had a wonderful marriage. I trust Nellie completely and told her that I don’t have a problem with the game, and she can do whatever she wants with her friends. However, it still bothers me. Do I have a problem here? – Nellie’s Husband

Dear Husband: Ooh la la. When high school girls play this game, they do it with boys. Nellie may be participating because she’s looking for some excitement, but we think whoever suggested the game wanted to find a plausible way to kiss the other gals without emotional risk. You might discuss this possibility with Nellie. Still, if your wife has sexual feelings toward her friends, you will find out eventually. And if not, you have nothing to worry about.

Dear Annie: We have been friends with “Ed and Nancy” for more than 30 years. Two years ago, we traveled to Alaska together and met another nice couple. We kept in touch with them for a while, but the e-mails soon waned.

Last week, Ed and Nancy told us that they were meeting this other couple for dinner. Apparently, they’ve been in touch since the Alaska trip. We were surprised they didn’t include us. Nancy said she didn’t feel it was their place to invite us, since getting together was the other couple’s idea.

Are we right to feel slighted? – Linda in California

Dear Linda: The Alaska couple is friends with Ed and Nancy, not you. They’ve kept in touch and you haven’t. Yes, Ed and Nancy could have asked about including you (and maybe they did), but the other couple is under no obligation to invite you just because all of you met at the same time. You can’t expect to be included in every invitation involving a mutual acquaintance, so please don’t let your hurt feelings end a 30-year friendship.