Batista? Or Ayala?

Don’t look now, but Bobby Ayala is back.

If you remove Miguel Batista’s latex mask you will find Ayala. This man couldn’t get the batboy out. Zippo Lighter Fluid has sent him a contract to be a national spokesman. How can Dim Riggleman continue to trot out Batista with the game on the line? Rick the Safeco peanut vender has better stuff.

Sunday, young Brandon Morrow had a no-hitter into the sixth, and after giving up a run in the seventh and leading 3-1, Batista was summoned from the bullpen to the tune of “Light My Fire.” Soon mothers were removing their children from the front rows of Oakland Coliseum as balls were bouncing off and over the walls. Oakland wins 5-3 and Migsmell goes to 4-14 with a 6.26 ERA. And all this for the bargain price of $9 million!

Combine this with Carlos “No Jugo” Silva’s $12 million (4-14, 6.46 ERA), Jarrod Washburn’s $9.3 million (5-14, 4.69 ERA), Eric Bedard’s $7 million (six wins) and you have a $37.3 million rotation that this spring Seattle’s macular degenerative management thought was the best group of starters. This brain trust makes Lehman Brothers look good.

And, oh, we have them all coming back next year! Yippee!

May the sewers of Rangoon back up into their breakfasts.

Tom Engdahl

Spokane