Smart bombs: Obama takes a bullet?

President Barack Obama and conspiracy theories seem as inseparable as Dick Cheney and scowls, but I’m beginning to suspect he is a secret member of the National Rifle Association and getting kickbacks from weapons and ammunitions sellers. Think I’m crazy? Well, throughout his career he’s made noise about controlling guns. He made that comment about rural voters “clinging to their guns.” He has painted a giant bull’s-eye on his back, but what has he done?

Not much. Well, that’s not accurate. He just signed a bill allowing people to pack heat in national parks. That’s high-five material for people who fear him. President George W. Bush couldn’t get that done. Former Interior Secretary Dirk Kempthorne couldn’t either. In fact, Obama’s action overturned a ban signed by James Watt, the Wyoming cowboy who rode in President Ronald Reagan’s posse.

Is that change gun-rights libertarians can believe in? Doubt it. But perhaps that’s just the way the trilateral commission of Obama, gun suppliers and the NRA want it. As long as they can keep the citizenry on high alert, the gun-selling and fundraising will be easier than plinking a coffee can off a fence post at 10 paces. And if some of that money found its way back to Obama, who would suspect it?

Other than me.

Revolver credit. In December, I wrote about the run on guns triggered by Obama’s election. I dismissed the fear, but so far the president has been more indifferent than I imagined. At the time, I said: “The one thing he might do that is politically popular is restore the ban on loaded weapons in national parks.”

Think I’ll holster the predictions from now on. Sure, the measure was wrapped up in efforts to bring sanity to credit card charges, but if Obama were as adamantly opposed to the Second Amendment as my correspondents assured me, he would’ve vetoed the bill.

Nevertheless, I suspect the buying frenzy will continue until the sellers run out. In Montana, the end is near. The Missoulian reports that many people are stockpiling ammo. Bitterroot Valley Ammunitions’ three facilities produce 300,000 rounds a day, but they can’t keep up with demand. The owner credits, er, blames the Obama administration for his skyrocketing sales.

Talk about a win-win. Now when Annie gets her gun with plastic, she’s protected from the credit-card robbers, too.