The Slice: Do you have bear necessities?

There are several key differences between Inland Northwest humans and bears.

For one thing, you never see bears driving around with insanely loud car stereos. And bears don’t arrive late for a meeting just to make sure everyone knows how busy and important they are.

But there are similarities. At this time of year, there’s a big one — the urge to den up.

While this works as a lifestyle for bears, it’s not a great idea for people. It’s bad for productivity.

So be alert. Here are the warning signs that you are in the early stages of denning up. Apply coffee, as needed.

1. You develop an unnatural obsession with flannel.

2. You RSVP to social invitations by sending notes that say, “Hibernating that night.”

3. Those calling your home are greeted by a message that says, “Hi, we’re here, but experiencing seasonal torpor.”

4. When people try to get you out of bed, they hear a low growl emanating from deep under the covers.

5. You find yourself watching a “Curb Your Enthusiasm” marathon and feel your metabolism slowing down.

6. You abide in your pajamas.

7. The dwindling sunlight makes you squint and cover your eyes.

8. You drink 16 ounces of hot chocolate and fall asleep in front of the fireplace.

9. You come to the realization that if you stay perfectly still, your bladder can hold a lot.

10. You start telling people that you got your degree in layering.

11. The way your hair looks startles the cat.

12. You refer to children as cubs.

Today’s Slice question: Where do you encounter fragrance overkill most often?