The Slice: Some prefer to keep clutter to themselves

The Slice managed to track down and speak with the only house-dwelling family in the Spokane area that has never held a yard sale.

To protect their privacy, I will withhold their identity.

As always, you won’t believe what these interview subjects had to say.

Q: So why haven’t you had a yard sale?

A (Dad): I just don’t think I have a thick enough hide. If I saw some poodle-permed guy in a sleeveless “Porn Star” sweatshirt and aviator sunglasses scoffing at our stuff, I’m pretty sure it would annoy me.

Q: But aren’t people around here required to love bargaining?

A (Mom): That’s not us. We’re more of a “you get what you pay for” family.

Q: But what about ridding yourself of clutter?

A (Daughter, 13): No one is going in my room to collect stuff for a sale. Not now. Not ever. My stuff is MY stuff. Keep out.

Q: Wouldn’t you enjoy the social aspect?

A (Son, 8): I’m not supposed to talk to strangers or bad persons. And from what I’ve seen at sales in our neighborhood, that’s who goes to these things.

Q: I think you folks have this all wrong. Yard sales are supposed to be a chance to clear out some things you don’t need, make a little cash and meet some fun people. Right?

A (Dad): I don’t enjoy being judged by strangers, some of whom are rude and some of whom are thieves.

Q: But what about the fun of deciding on prices, arranging displays and making signs?

A (Mom): Woo-hoo!

Q: Have you people ever even been to a yard sale?

A (Dad): Yes. It gave me an idea. We’ll keep our junk. And everyone else can keep theirs.

Today’s Slice question: Is complimenting co-workers on their appearance about to become a thing of the past?