April 15, 2010 in Features

The Slice: It’s truly a monster debate

By The Spokesman-Review

Could you do me a favor?

If you have access to someone who is too young to read the newspaper, please ask that child a question for me.

Which is scarier, monsters under the bed or monsters in the closet?

Thank you.

A new wrinkle: Fred and Catherine Lauritsen’s 5-year-old granddaughter refers to crow’s feet as “kitty whiskers.”

David Rolando’s claim to fame: The Spokane sixth-grade teacher wears a tie four days a week but never dons the same one twice in the same school year.

“Let me assure you, the kids do watch,” he said.

On Fridays, he wears sacred Harley-Davidson T-shirts.

Slice answers: One reader guessed that vegetarians go hog wild when encountering the aroma of bacon frying.

But Carole Hayes said it’s a definite turn-off. “It smells like sweat to me,” she wrote. “No kidding.”

When animals do the wild thing: Jamie Laughlin’s 4-year-old niece, Riley, witnessed a pair of raccoons engaged in intimate social congress.

The little girl asked her mother what was up with the “Coonies.” And her mother said the animals were playing husband and wife.

Riley accepted this as the outdoor action looked to her like an argument.

In addition to sidewalk spitters, there are…: “Joggers who hold down one nostril while emptying the other out on the sidewalk or street, as if the weight and use of a tissue would ruin their speed,” wrote Karen Robie.

Warm-up question: You know how watching the “Godfather” movies can make you want to have pasta and tomato sauce? Sure. Well, will those watching HBO’s “Treme” crave red beans and rice?

Today’s Slice question: At what point did you stop taking delight in spotting wildlife in urban settings because you can’t escape the suspicion that the animals are probably living on borrowed time?

Write The Slice at P.O. Box 2160, Spokane, WA 99210; call (509) 459-5470; fax (509) 459-5098; e-mail pault@spokesman.com. It just seems like the Stanley Cup playoffs last 11 months.

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