December 20, 2010 in Features

The Slice: Even saviors need naps

By The Spokesman-Review
 

Victoria Van Inwegen’s son, Alex, is almost 8 now.

But when he was really little, his version of “Silent Night” was a bit off.

Oh, he was totally serious. And he was on the mark with tune and tempo.

But what came out of his mouth was…

Christ our savior is bored

Christ our savior is bored

Speaking of memorable mistakes: Liz Schatz told about a preschooler in a family she knows.

The kid has been learning the Lord’s Prayer.

During one practice run, she included the entreaty “…forgive us our dress pants.”

She probably meant “trespasses.”

But maybe this little girl has overheard style-conscious adults talking about the way people around here attire themselves. And perhaps she thought prayer was in order.

Slice answer: “Never got a bite with the elf outfit,” wrote Karen Mobley. “But our cat, Tiger, bit me in the face when I tried to dress him in a pink doll dress. I was about 6. In retrospect, I don’t know if he objected to the transvestite aspects of this or the tightness around the neck.”

Today’s Slice question: When you make a mistake while writing a note on a Christmas card or addressing the envelope, how do you decide if the goof-up is bad enough to necessitate tossing it out and starting over?

A) If the recipient isn’t on my A list, I just scratch out the miscue and keep writing. B) It depends on whether my attempt to change “Caitlin” into “Kaitlin” only makes it look like I wrote “Haitlin.” C) Could I get away with covering up the error with a strategically placed holiday sticker? D) Perhaps, instead of reckoning that I am a poor speller, the recipient will simply conclude that my handwriting features a few inscrutable flourishes. E) Considering my history with this person, it’s not likely that he or she will suddenly decide to judge me on the basis of erratic penmanship or shaky command of grammar. F) How many extra cards do I have? G) Do you get points for neatness? H) Will it appear that I was drunk when I wrote “Happpy New Year”? I) Is the recipient an editor? J) Other.

Write The Slice at P.O. Box 2160, Spokane, WA 99210; call (509) 459-5470; fax (509) 459-5098; e-mail pault@spokesman.com. Just one more Monday left this year.


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