The Slice: New Fools’ Day is for the birds

The problem with April Fools’ Day is that it comes too late.

The Snow Birds are already back up here by then.

Let me explain.

Every year at this time I receive e-mails from readers spending the winter in Yuma, Ariz. or Ultraviolet, Calif. Some have been reading the S-R online while away. Others haven’t but still want to hear about what’s going on in Spokane.

Every once in a while, I’m tempted to play a small trick on these correspondents when they ask, “What’s new?”

I have an urge to reply, “They finished the North-South Freeway.”

Of course, for this leg-pulling to be truly effective, I would need the complicity of www.spokesman.com. Still, I might be able to momentarily fool those who aren’t really keeping tabs on local news while away.

Just imagine.

“Hi, Irene. Thanks for the note. It might interest you to know that the city has completed a light-rail system since you headed south.”

“Thanks for the e-mail, Caitlin. The local TV news shows have finally given it a rest re: that HD this and HD that nonsense.”

“Good to hear from you, Bud. You would have liked this one Blanchette column where he found a Zags fan who admitted to not knowing squat about basketball.”

“The letters to the editor dealing with politics have been measured and thoughtful lately. Lots of writers acknowledging shades of gray.”

“That Spokane medical school idea got shot down because people thought they would have to sign a loyalty oath to the Huskies.”

“The Inlander doubled its newsstand price.”

“There’s a new Spokane SUV tax and a yard sale ban.”

“I went three Slices in a row without writing about myself.”

Today’s Slice question: Does the whole potatoes thing get old for Idaho residents far from spuds country?