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The Slice: Is it time for a meeting of the Marmots?

Fri., June 4, 2010, midnight

A year ago, The Slice hosted a gathering of former newspaper carriers out behind the Review Tower.

We talked about the old days and took turns hurling rolled-up papers. I think everyone had a good time.

Anyway, the modest success of that event got me thinking. Maybe the Marmot Lodge should break with tradition and actually have a meeting.

I’ve mentioned this prospect before. But I’m still going back and forth.

I’ll show you.

Pro: I enjoy meeting Slice readers in person, in settings that do not require me to give a speech.

Con: There’s a chance no one would show up.

Pro: It would be fun to demonstrate the secret handshake.

Con: One or more of my stalkers could make things weird.

Pro: I think regular contributors to my column would enjoy getting to put faces with names.

Con: If there’s a problem with restroom access or the supply of plastic forks, people might expect me to take care of it.

Pro: An informal party called Marmotfest could be fun.

Con: I suspect some of the Marmots are a bit shy.

Pro: I enjoy handing out coveted reporter’s notebooks in person.

Con: Some people might stay away because of the mistaken fear that I would say something unkind about their children’s names.

Pro: It’s good for readers to hear from me in person that I definitely don’t think every one of the thousands of columns I’ve written was a home run. Take this one, for instance.

Con: Explaining to someone why I have not used any of her 324 submissions could get awkward.

Pro: It would be fun to say, “OK, I’m off to my Marmot Lodge meeting.”

Con: There might be grumbling if I declared the potato salad contest a 14-way tie.

Today’s Slice question: Why is your favorite room accorded that status?

Write The Slice at P.O. Box 2160, Spokane, WA 99210; call (509) 459-5470; fax (509) 459-5098; e-mail Talking about the need to repot plants isn’t the same as actually repotting them.

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