March 18, 2010 in Features

The Slice: A guide to March digress

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I want to help preview the NCAA basketball action here in Spokane, but don’t wish to aid gamblers.

So here is an assessment guaranteed to be utterly useless.

New Mexico State: I once worked at an uninspired evening newspaper in El Paso, Texas. And as a symbol of our intention to get out of that situation, one of my copy desk colleagues and I used to drive over to Las Cruces, N.M. (home of NMSU) and visit this one surprisingly good newsstand.

Michigan State: In 1968, when I was in junior high, one of my favorite teachers was a Michigan State graduate. In October of that year, we bonded over the Detroit Tigers’ World Series comeback.

Purdue: While living in Tennessee, I briefly had a deskmate named Cecilia who was a Purdue grad. For a surreal couple of weeks, she worked full-time in a corporate PR job without having bothered to actually leave her position at the newspaper where we were employed.

Siena: One of my freshman-year suitemates at Castleton State College in Vermont was from near Loudonville, N.Y., home of Siena. He and his girlfriend argued nonstop.

Texas A&M: I once worked for a publisher who was a proud Aggie. I assume he must have had a stroke and died the first time he saw a “Question Authority” bumper sticker.

Utah State: I have a friend who worked in Logan (home of USU). I used to live in Flagstaff, Ariz. We discussed the two cities’ relative merits.

Houston: I once encountered a cab driver in Houston who compensated for not being able to speak much English by yelling.

Maryland: I saw Texas beat Maryland 42-0 in the 1978 Sun Bowl. My date alternated between saying she was freezing to death and indicating that she was bored to death. What fun.

Today’s Slice question: What does it say about a guy if he gets all squeamish and reluctant to have a male pet neutered but doesn’t bat a lash at the idea of having female pets fixed?

Write The Slice at P.O. Box 2160, Spokane, WA 99210; call (509) 459-5470; fax (509) 459-5098; e-mail pault@spokesman.com. Yes, I’ve heard about “A Behanding in Spokane.”

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