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The Slice: Get on board with ‘Get Off My Lawn’

Here are three reasons why “Get off my lawn” ought to be Spokane’s official slogan.

1. If that appeared on highway signs greeting those entering the city, it might make people smile.

2. It would suggest self-confidence and a lack of pretension.

3. Some residents would approve of the slogan without realizing it isn’t supposed to be taken seriously.

Just wondering: Can you recall starting a new school year after a summer in which your body changed significantly?

Happy 70th birthday to Raquel Welch: Which of the following was a line in “One Million Years B.C.”?

A) “Fat, drunk and stupid is no way to go through life, son.” B) “You aren’t too smart, are you? I like that in a man.” C) “You bet I’ll get out of here, baby. I’ll get out of here but quick.” D) “I like to watch.” E) “I’m not really Leo Farnsworth.” F) “You go down there.” G) “Me, Loana. You, Tumak.”

Yes, that’s correct.

Speaking of birthdays: Today is Bob Newhart’s. Call The Slice and record your best impression of him.

Let’s see a show of hands: North Idaho grade-school teacher Carol Nelson still has a miniskirt she created in an eighth-grade home economics class back around the time Loana and Tumak roamed the Earth. And she wonders. “Do other people have things they made in home ec or shop class?”

Another reader’s request: “You might ask your readers: ‘What annoying habit of Spokane drivers, though not illegal, should be?’ I’ll have a good one to submit.”

Hmmm. OK, let me guess. Might it be driving with dogs in their laps? Driving with dogs who are texting?

In the matter of detecting the scent of polecats: The Slice heard from a reader who recalled that his mother used to think she was smelling a skunk when actually it was marijuana.

Today’s Slice question: In what way has life changed for those who have a degree from the University of Idaho since fellow Vandal Sarah Palin became famous?

Write The Slice at P.O. Box 2160, Spokane, WA 99210; call (509) 459-5470; fax (509) 459-5098; e-mail pault@spokesman.com. One of my correspondents has “lakepiggies” as part of her family’s e-mail address.

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