February 17, 2011 in City

Doug Clark: MAC needs a lesson in greasing commission

• Print
• Email
• Share

The Northwest Museum of Arts and Culture has turned to the Spokane County Commission for help, which should tell you just how leaky things are over at our poor, budget-strapped MAC.

Asking the county commissioners for anything connected to the arts is like asking Larry the Cable Guy to critique a Monet exhibit.

Need I remind you that these are the philistines who thought investing public money in a toxic racetrack was a great idea?

Well, two out of the three, anyway.

Basically, the MAC is hoping to get some financial support from the Public Facilities District, which operates the INB Performing Arts Center and the Spokane Convention Center. Getting the thumbs up from County Commissioners Todd Mielke, Mark Richard and Al French would go a long way toward making that plan happen.

Now, I’m for anything that keeps the MAC alive and vibrant.

I love museums. In fact, when I was in New York last year I logged serious time inside the Museum of Natural History, the Metropolitan Museum of Art and the Museum of Modern Art.

Speaking of the MoMA, I was there in time to see this highly publicized exhibit that featured young, attractive and completely naked models standing stock still in a large, art-filled room, maintaining various poses.

That was impressive. Usually you have to drive all the way to the Déjà Vu to witness culture on this level.

But getting back to the MAC’s financial difficulties …

It didn’t seem from our news story on the matter that our commissioners were all that interested. Oh, sure, they promised Ron Rector, the museum’s executive director, that they would talk to state legislators and such.

But I know the drill. It was essentially the same vague, passive-aggressive baloney I get every time I hit up my editor for a merit raise.

Rector obviously doesn’t have a clue as to how to win commissioners’ hearts.

If only he had asked for my help. I would have gladly handled the negotiations.

CLARK – “Hello, commissioners. Thanks for finding time to see me.”

MIELKE – “You’re always welcome here, Doug. What’s up?”

CLARK – “Well, the nice folks over at the MAC …”

RICHARD – “The what?”

CLARK – “The museum? In Browne’s Addition? The building with all the paintings and stuff?”

RICHARD – “Oh. Well. Thanks, Doug. But we have a pretty full schedule today, and …”

CLARK – “The MAC people just wanted me to tell you about this exciting new exhibit they’re planning. It’s called “NASCAR Through the Ages” and …”

MIELKE – “Say, what?”

CLARK – “You heard me. It’s all about NASCAR. There’s going to be real race cars and historic memorabilia like the used filter from Richard Petty’s first oil change. Oh, yeah. And we’re hoping to have a visit from none other than Dale Earnhardt Jr.”

RICHARD and MIELKE (gasping in unison) – “JUUU-NIOR!?!”

CLARK – “Yep. In the flesh. Of course, this is all in the planning stage. You’ve probably read how Olympia bailed on the museum. We’re desperately trying to come up with new ways to keep the doors open.”

MIELKE – “Why, we can’t let something as trivial as money prevent the youth of Spokane County from experiencing the cultural wonder of NASCAR.”

CLARK – “My museum friends were hoping you commissioners would use your influence to speak favorably to the Public Facilities District. You know, about the MAC receiving some local tax dollars to make up for our lack of state support.

RICHARD – “Consider it done! But before you go, let us give you a little something to take back to the museum.”

MIELKE – Al! Wake up! Go get the county checkbook. Now, Doug, how much do you need?”

CLARK – “Oh, commissioners. You’re too kind.”

Doug Clark is a columnist for The Spokesman-Review. He can be reached at (509) 459-5432 or by e-mail at dougc@spokesman.com.

Eight comments on this story so far. Add yours!

• 

  Wheezywilson on February 17 at 8:03 a.m.

  Bra-vo!

• 

  D Statler on February 17 at 8:20 a.m.

  LOL @ Doug, Times are tough here. Any chance we could employ and house any of Spokane’s homeless un-employed in that building and display our real culture? This situation at the museum could still receive some County aid without NASCAR.
  In the mean time,maybe we could get some homeless un-employed to get that race track swept for the up coming racing season! Some room there for a few families to sleep too :^(

• 

  jdodgion on February 17 at 9:05 a.m.

  Why does the MAC think it needs Spokane Tax dollars to keep doors open. raise private capital !!

• 

  hawken on February 17 at 9:18 a.m.

  Yes,,,, let me repeat,,,, “raise private capital.”

  Clarke’s time spent was at museums in NYC is all very interesting. I spent days at the Smithsonian and didn’t even begin to penetrate the history. That too is all very interesting.

  Not essential to our economy, but very interesting.

  “Very interesting” should be taken off the menu in our current, dire, economic situation.

• 

  hunternomore on February 17 at 10:35 a.m.

  Does the term “knuckle-dragging neanderthals” apply to some of these commenters? LOL to Doug. The only person with a sense of humor at the SR!

• 

  zelda on February 17 at 1:37 p.m.

  If I’m not mistaken, all three commissioners have backgrounds as real estate developers. Where are there big chunks of acreage just crying out for housing developments? The West Plains (pre-2008). Where are the prisons, whose inmates count as “residents” in the census? The West Plains.

  What is Spokane County’s largest employer? Fairchild AFB. What is Spokane County’s 2nd largest private employer? Northern Quest Casino.

  The West Plains/Airway Heights is Spokane County’s circle of life.

  It’s easy to see where the commissioners priorities are.

• 

  zelda on February 17 at 1:51 p.m.

  Oops, forgot an important one. Where is the Spokane International Airport? West Plains.

  The management of that place deserves its own separate Doug Clark column.

• 

  D Statler on February 17 at 9:56 p.m.

  Hmm, We could house plenty of homeless in that beautiful casino too.They could work there for their keep.Close to the race track! LOL