Arrow-right Camera
Subscribe now

This column reflects the opinion of the writer. Learn about the differences between a news story and an opinion column.

The Slice: Having fun with grave thoughts

The Slice heard about a local guy who supposedly has indicated he wants “Always Said ‘Inland Empire,’ Never ‘Inland Northwest’ ” on his gravestone.

Well, that would make a statement.

What would you want on yours?

How about, “If He Couldn’t Park Within 50 Feet of the Door, He Said ‘The Heck With It’ and Went Home.”

Or maybe, “She Correctly Predicted the Grandchildren Would Turn Out Rotten.”

Tuesday contest: I’ll send a coveted reporter’s notebook to at least one reader who comes up with an entertaining way to finish the following sentence.

“Things haven’t been the same around here since…”

Slice answers: “I have two drawbacks to hanging out laundry,” wrote Karen Meye of Ritzville.

One is that it’s a bit of a trudge to haul all the wet clothes up from the basement laundry room and out to the backyard clothesline.

Then there’s the possibility of a dust storm.

Still, if she lugs the clothes outside and the weather cooperates, she’s rewarded with laundry that smells extra-fresh.

Chewelah’s Marilyn Othmer mentioned a few other concerns.

“A pine beetle getting caught in the corner of a fitted sheet and not noticed until being put on the bed, pine pollen in the spring makes a huge yellowish-green coating on anything outside, and crow poop.”

If you moved here yesterday: The expression “Dry Side” does not mean you can’t purchase alcohol in this part of the state.

North Idaho’s Rick Rhodes notes three features of life in Sandpoint:

1. Drivers in pickups will stop for a chat, blocking traffic both ways.

2. Cashiers will rummage around in the trash if that’s what it takes to find you a coupon.

3. Even plumbers are friendly.

I stand corrected: Quite a few Slice readers reported that they have never run over a squirrel while driving.

Glad to hear it.

Today’s Slice question: If we can agree that Olympia is an insane choice, what city should be Washington’s capital?

Write The Slice at P.O. Box 2160, Spokane, WA 99210; call (509) 459-5470; fax (509) 459-5098; email pault@spokesman.com. Name Spokane’s most hipster-infested neighborhood.

More from this author