Dear Annie: Once a week, a group of us gets together to play games at one of our houses. When the phone rings, the hostess will usually let it go to voicemail.
However, at one home, the hostess not only answers the phone, but she proceeds to have a long conversation with the caller. She often gets several calls during the time we’re there. Those playing have to sit and wait for her to finish. As far as we can tell, none of these calls is an emergency or anything that couldn’t wait until the rest of us have gone home. Would you comment on this, please? – Interrupted
Dear Interrupted: When you invite guests to your home, it is rude to allow nonemergency phone calls to repeatedly interfere with socializing. One of you should take the woman aside and ask her to please stop doing this. Or, when she picks up the next call, say, “Oh, Doris, since you’re going to be talking, we’ll just play your hand for you.” That should shorten the conversation substantially.
Dear Annie: I hope you have room for one more letter about the efficacy of counseling.
After extricating myself from an abusive marriage, I sought help from a professional. But I found it confusing, frustrating and ineffective. My counselor insisted that I had done absolutely nothing wrong in our marriage and my husband was 100 percent responsible for the disaster. But, how could that be? I am far from perfect. It did not benefit me to think that way.
I know counselors should be supportive and affirming, but this was ridiculous. The counselor ended up having no credibility in my eyes. – Didn’t Need It