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Annie’s Mailbox: ‘Gram’ sad to move from grandkids

Thu., Aug. 9, 2012

Dear Annie: I am a widow in my late 60s. Four years ago, I moved to be closer to my children and grandchildren, and it’s been wonderful.

Recently, I reconnected with an old boyfriend, and we have fallen in love. We want to spend what time we have left together. The problem is, I would have to move to his home, which is three hours away. I’m already experiencing tears and hard feelings from my family. The adults I can deal with, but what do I tell my little grandchildren who say, “We had you first, Gram”? How do I make them understand that my love for them will never change and that we can still visit? – Sad Gram

Dear Gram: It’s sweet that your family will miss you so much, but the only way to make the children understand is to let them live through the experience. You are only three hours away. When they see how often you visit, call, write, email, Skype, whatever, they will be able to accept your new circumstances more easily.

Dear Annie: I have a solution for “Maria in Ohio,” who asked how to word wedding invitations when the parents are divorced and remarried to others. This is how our family now handles things:

“Together with their parents, Bride Jane’s name and Groom Joe’s name invite you to share in their joy as they exchange wedding vows,” followed by the date, time and location.

This is the format, no matter who is paying for the event or how much, and it doesn’t matter how many parents or stepparents are involved. (When did life get so complicated?) – B.S.

Annie’s Mailbox is written by Kathy Mitchell and Marcy Sugar, longtime editors of the Ann Landers column. Please email your questions to, or write to: Annie’s Mailbox, c/o Creators Syndicate, 737 3rd Street, Hermosa Beach, CA 90254.

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