February 23, 2012 in Features

The Slice: Apparently it’s just a grand illusion

By The Spokesman-Review
 

A Slice reader said it was one thing when strangers assumed she was a parent (she’s not).

But now people have started assuming that she is a grandparent.

Let’s move on.

Memorable malapropisms: When he was a teenager, Bob Launhardt of Pinehurst, Idaho, had a girlfriend who used to mention her “Chester drawers.”

“Of course, I knew she was referring to a ‘chest of drawers.’ Or, at least that’s what I thought she was saying.”

Notebook winner: Thanks to all who took part in the “Twilight Zone” challenge. There were several spirited performances of the climactic “To Serve Man” reveal – “It’s … it’s a cookbook!”

But I’m declaring Spokane Valley’s Daniel Karber to be the winner.

Sentence finishing: “Spokane is a great place to raise children if … you don’t mind the lack of ethnic diversity here.” – Chris Bishop

“Spokane is the biggest city between Minneapolis and Seattle if … you agree it is the second biggest city between Minneapolis and Tokyo.” – Steve Helmbrecht

“Portlandia”-esque lines from the nonexistent show “Spokandia”: “Put a crow on it,” said Marilyn Othmer.

Several others suggested various uses of “marmot” including “Put a marmot on it” and randomly saying “What the marmot?”

Here’s what Sue Hille says to anti-vaccination proponents: “My eldest brother died from polio at the age of 3, before I was born, before polio vaccine was available. ’Nuff said.”

Quoting Cheech and Chong: Dave Neuenschwander, who graduated from high school in 1970, clearly remembers classmates yelling “Dave’s not here” in various settings.

Closet space: “When we bought this house 46 years ago it had three small closets,” wrote Peggy Ackerman.

They started adding closets and kept at it. Now one of Ackerman’s friends says that if they ever sell the place they should advertise “closets for sale” that come with a house.

Today’s Slice question: If there was spring training in your line of work, what would you work on this year?

Write The Slice at P.O. Box 2160, Spokane, WA 99210; call (509) 459-5470; email pault@spokesman.com. Who is Spokane’s “It” girl?


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