Hubby’s approach needs some work

Dear Annie: My sex life has always been important to me. My wife and I are in our early 60s. This is my third marriage. For the first three years, the sex was good, but the past two have been a problem.

I tell my wife that I am going upstairs and getting ready for bed, and I mention having sex, and she tells me that she will be up in a few minutes. About four hours later, she comes to bed saying she fell asleep watching TV. After several of these excuses, I asked her to be honest. She insists there is no problem.

When she works, she doesn’t want sex, so this weekend I asked if we could have sex, and she said OK, but again fell asleep in front of the TV. She promised to make it up to me the next night, but it was the same story. This upsets me.

I am thinking of divorce. She told me that she and her last husband were like roommates, and I feel it is happening in our marriage, too. Any suggestions? – Lost in El Paso

Dear Lost: We will say that your approach is a bit lacking. “I’m going to bed and I’d like sex” is not quite the turn-on you might think. It also is not uncommon for women past menopause to lose desire. Gently suggest to your wife that she talk to her doctor about hormonal help for her libido. Then please work on your romantic technique, and find out what will make her more interested in intimacy.

Dear Annie: My deep sympathy to “Indianapolis,” whose evil sister-in-law is keeping the family from seeing their dying brother.

My uncle married a woman who did her best for 35 years to keep him from the rest of the family. She was petty and nasty and had our uncle wrapped around her finger. When he became ill, she didn’t tell us he was in hospice. We’d call their house, and she’d say he was too tired to talk. Then she told us to stop calling because the phone disturbed him. We didn’t find out he had died until a cousin wrote with condolences. – Sad Just Thinking About It