The Slice: A misadventure in babysitting

Let’s start by recalling a not-so great moment in babysitting.

Spokane bank executive Wade Griffith was about 11 when neighbors asked him to watch their infant for an evening.

When he arrived at the appointed time, Griffith was informed that the baby was already tucked in and should be set for the night.

So young Wade settled in with a book and passed a quiet night. When the parents returned home, they paid him (15 cents an hour) and offered thanks.

The next morning, Griffith’s mother asked how the babysitting had gone. He reported that it had been fine and noted that he never actually saw the kid.

His mother fixed her gaze on him and they had a little talk.

Pump up the plumage: “Hey Paul, I need to rebuild the neck ruff on my giant vulture that greets the Bloomsday participants at the top of Doomsday Hill,” wrote Bill Robinson. “Note that I did not call it the Bloomsday Vulture as it is not affiliated with the Lilac Bloomsday Association.

“To make its ruff all that it can be, I need a bunch of rooster tail feathers. I can buy all sorts of other kinds of feathers, but the long iridescent black tail feathers of barnyard roosters just do not appear at places that sell feathers.

“They fall out here and there among flocks of domestic chickens and are available when roosters die. They are generally readily available and free in small quantities when I am not looking for them.

“I am hoping that you will do me the great favor of using The Slice to put the word out that I need rooster tail and any other fancy feathers. If you do this for me, I will give you a vulture appearance of up to two hours at the (nonpolitical/ noncommercial) event of your choice.”

If you can help Bill, please contact The Slice and I’ll pass along your contact info. Please don’t send feathers to me.

As for the vulture-appearance offer, that would be tantamount to accepting a gift of a certain value. I could not do that. But it does make me wonder.

Today’s Slice question: If you could be visited by the Doomsday Hill vulture, where would you want this to take place?

A) Backyard cookout. B) At the office. C) Birthday party. D) Church. E) School. F) At my friend’s workplace. G) The lake. H) The gym. I) Golf course. J) Hoopfest. K) Preschool. L) Other.