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Annie’s Mailbox: Email OK to tell some of a death

Dear Annie: What are your thoughts about the practice of notifying friends by email of the death of a loved one? This person also included instructions on how to offer condolences and provided recommendations for places to contribute in memory of the departed. – Pennsylvania

Dear Pennsylvania: Like it or not, email has become one way people now notify others of everything. And while it may be less appropriate than a phone call or handwritten note, it’s certainly more private than posting it on Facebook. Family members and close friends should still be told of a death with a personal call. Others can be informed in whichever way gets the news out in the most timely manner.

Suggestions for charitable donations and conveying condolences would be included in a newspaper death notice and are therefore acceptable in such an email.

Dear Annie: You suggested to “Roommate,” whose 13-year relationship was lacking intimacy, that her husband get his testosterone levels checked. Why is it that when men don’t want sex, it’s because their hormone levels are off, but when women don’t want intimacy, it’s because the relationship needs work?

You would think researchers would be all over finding a physiological reason for women’s lack of interest. Not once has any doctor recommended that I get my hormone levels checked. – Ohio

Dear Ohio: You must not be a regular reader of this column. We’ve done countless letters on women and their hormone levels. The best advocate for your health care is YOU. If you think your hormone levels are off, don’t wait for your doctor to suggest it. Insist on being tested. And researchers are indeed “all over” finding a pill for women that equals Viagra for men. Not there yet.

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