November 15, 2012 in Features

The Slice: Even children know these are hairy times

By The Spokesman-Review
 

Slice reader Mildred Scheel’s nephew is a grade-school teacher in Northampton, Mass.

He shared a story.

It seems he had asked children in his class to imagine that they were the president of the United States. What would be the most important problem to tackle?

That’s a tough one, no doubt. But one girl had an idea. “Puberty,” she said.

This surprised the teacher, as you might imagine. He tentatively acknowledged that it was, indeed, a challenging topic.

Then he asked the student to elaborate.

“That’s just it,” she said. “I know it’s bad. I just can’t come up with the reasons. I just know we have to stop puberty!”

If only.

Then Scheel’s nephew realized what the kid was trying to say. To confirm his analysis, he alluded to families not having enough money for food, et cetera.

“Exactly,” said the girl.

Before engaging in some related brainstorming with the class, the teacher quietly showed the girl how to spell and pronounce “poverty.”

Scheel didn’t say whether her nephew’s pupils came up with any bold ideas to help fight hunger, unemployment and homelessness.

But if he hears any suggestions about stopping puberty, I hope he will pass them along. More than a few Spokane area parents would be all ears.

Try to work this festive question into a conversation soon: “Say brainless, don’t you know where coconuts come from?”

Thanksgiving birthdays: Florence Young’s sister, Jeane, was born on a Thanksgiving Day that fell on Nov. 26. “She has never celebrated on that date unless Thanksgiving fell on it,” wrote Young. “Thanksgiving Day is always considered her birthday.”

And Tomas Kelley Lynch’s birthday occasionally falls on Thanksgiving. Growing up, a person celebrating a birthday in his family got to choose the dinner. Lynch usually wanted pizza. But his dad vetoed that selection on Thanksgiving birthdays. Attempts to override were unsuccessful.

Today’s Slice question: How often does your family have meals together?

Write The Slice at P.O. Box 2160, Spokane, WA 99210; call (509) 459-5470; email pault@spokesman.com. Pipe band member Kenyon Fields said his kilt is the garment of his that elicits the lion’s share of the clothing compliments he hears.


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