October 1, 2012 in Features

The Slice: May the best marmot win

By The Spokesman-Review
 

OK, it’s the fourth quarter. Here’s your pep talk.

“It’s not the size of the marmot in the fight. It’s the size of the fight in the marmot.”

Re: Knowing the names of your neighbors: The Slice heard from a reader I’ll just call Kerrie. She knows the names, because they are ones she herself coined.

Tree People: Trimmed their tree, crashed a large branch onto their house – twice.

Rock Man: Lined up big rocks in front of his house so no one would drive on his lawn.

Naked Man: Well, all he wears is a pair of ’70s gym shorts and sneakers when walking around outside in summer.

The Clone: Geez, he looks like my ex-husband.

Truck Man: Fell out of his truck upon returning home from … drinking?

Mystery Mamas: We know two women live there, but we never see them.

Lawn Shavers: Have never seen anyone cut their grass so short.

Ambulance House: No emergency – their kids drive an old ambulance.

Charlie’s Dad: Don’t know the dog’s name, we call him Charlie. He barks a lot.

Disney House: The Realtor offered a trip to Disneyland to anyone who bought it. Still for sale.

Those 2013 calendars are filling up: Lou Sachse will be at the Grand Canyon next summer to watch her daughter celebrate turning 40 by taking part in an annual run.

Herb Postlewait has trips to Arizona and Scotland penciled in.

Kerry Webb is looking ahead to Bloomsday. “I turn 60 next year and plan to walk it to demonstrate that 60 is just a number and not a punishment.”

Georgia Moore will celebrate turning 60 by going on a cruise with her sisters and daughters.

Doris Butler will be cat-sitting in Seattle while family members over there are in Italy.

“Dental appointments,” said Sue Hoover. “I need to go every three months and if I don’t schedule way in advance, I can’t get my preferred time.”

For the record: Jack Thompson knows how old Vietnam veterans are. So do I. His point in Thursday’s Slice was that some panhandlers who claim to have served during that era are obviously too young to be telling the truth.

Today’s Slice question: Where, one through 12, would you rank this month’s weather on your list of favorites?

Write The Slice at P.O. Box 2160, Spokane, WA 99210; call (509) 459-5470; email pault@spokesman.com. Hearing “Warshington” makes Lan Hellie shake his head.

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