Annie’s Mailbox: Tell mom’s doctor she’s more abusive
Dear Annie: My mom is 67 and pure evil. She manipulates her doctors, who don’t know the real truth. I’ve tried to remain patient and respectful, to no avail.
My mom has pushed everyone away. She has no friends. Since my father died, she’s become severely depressed. I’ve supported her and stood by her after all the evil and hateful things she’s done, but I can’t keep doing it.
Her sister came from Europe after a 30-year absence, and Mom treated her so poorly that my aunt says she’ll never come back. Now my mom has a boyfriend she met online who is 12 years younger. She won’t allow him to speak to his family members. She’s become physically and verbally abusive toward everyone.
I know she must be mentally ill, but the psychiatrist is only treating her for depression. Do I need to go to her doctor and explain? – Unhappy Daughter
Dear Unhappy: We cannot imagine what would make your mother “pure evil,” but mental illness can cover a lot of difficult behavior. Some medications that treat depression also alleviate other symptoms, but this doesn’t appear to be the case with Mom. It’s OK for you to notify her psychiatrist’s office that Mom’s behavior is increasingly abusive, but the doctor cannot discuss the treatment with you unless Mom gives her permission. If you think that’s a possibility, please ask her if you can come along to her next appointment.
Annie’s Mailbox is written by Kathy Mitchell and Marcy Sugar, longtime editors of the Ann Landers column. Please email your questions to anniesmailbox@ comcast.net, or write to: Annie’s Mailbox, c/o Creators Syndicate, 737 3rd Street, Hermosa Beach, CA 90254.