September 15, 2012 in Features

The Slice: Is it any wonder you’re null and void?

By The Spokesman-Review
 

Here are 20 questions worth mulling before contacting old acquaintances found during a meandering nostalgia-fueled session of Web surfing.

1. Would he even remember me?

2. Good grief, I haven’t aged as much as that, have I?

3. What if she already knows exactly where I am and what I’m doing and has chosen not to contact me?

4. Do I really need another “Yeah, let’s keep in touch” relationship destined to fall through the cracks?

5. Would trying to catch up on 25 years just be exhausting?

6. Will he suspect that I want something?

7. Does it sound odd to say “Thank you for your kindness back in ninth grade”?

8. Is there really any point to sending an email that says “I have forgiven you for the fact that you were wrongly named first-team all-state in 1973 while I was relegated to second-team.”

9. Would it suggest that you fail to grasp that life moves on?

10. Isn’t there a statute of limitations on “Remember when …” stories?

11. How long will it annoy you if he does not reply to your email or return your phone message?

12. Are you 100 percent sure it’s the right John Glass?

13. Is there something that really needs to be said?

14. How did it go last time you reached back into your past?

15. What if the person has had a sad, horrible life and hits you up for money?

16. What if she spends the whole time trying to talk you into going to the next reunion?

17. How long will it take to establish that there was nothing weird about the online searching leading to this?

18. Will you come off as someone with way too much time on his hands?

19. If you really had a meaningful connection wouldn’t you have stayed in contact?

20. Which is better guidance: “Nothing ventured, nothing gained” or “People are strange”?

Today’s Slice question: Have you ever had a job that involved punching a clock? (Let’s define that as having a personal time card that you inserted into a device that either created a special perforation or inked a time stamp on the card.)

I have. Long ago. But I remember the authoritative thunk that contraption made when the card was fed in.

Write The Slice at P.O. Box 2160, Spokane, WA 99210; call (509) 459-5470; email pault@spokesman.com. Not everyone can throw a spiral.


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