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The Slice: An invitation for stress? Just relax

Theoretical home entertaining is a staple of Spokane’s social scene.

“You know, we ought to have Fred and Ginger over sometime.”

“Yeah. They’re fun.”

“We’ll definitely have to consider that.”

“Sounds good.”

Oh, sure. There are plenty of bold people with reality-based social lives who actually do invite others over. Sometimes that even turns out to have been a good idea.

But many others exist mostly in the realm of “what if?”

It’s not because they don’t have friends. It’s not because they fear their friends’ three-beers personalities. It’s not because they don’t like their friends’ kids.

It is because of the daunting prospect of all the home-tidying that would have to precede answering the doorbell and saying ,“Well, there you are – come on in.”

You see, some people cling to the myth that everyone else’s domicile is uncluttered and immaculate. And as that image tends to makes you view the state of your own home in unflattering terms, it can be a challenge to get excited about having people over.

Sure, you would enjoy the sharing and the laughter. Sure, it would be great to see your pals away from the office or wherever. And yes, they probably wouldn’t even notice the things that make you uneasy about your living room’s potential to be seen as a sty.

Still, who wants to take a chance on being judged harshly? Who wants to imagine people driving away and making jokes about hoarding shows or saying things like, “What on Earth was that smell?”

But hey, they’re your friends. They wouldn’t do that. Would they?

In any event, speculating about having company is always easier than actually doing it.

OK, it seems like there’s a perfect solution – hosting backyard gatherings. Just mow the lawn, wipe off the grill and you’re ready to go.

But unless you will be renting a porta-potty, guests are still going to want to go in the house and see what’s in your medicine cabinet.

So really, you have two choices. You can relax and send out some invites. Or you can decide 2014 might be the perfect time for that get-together.

Today’s Slice question: Who taught you to drive?

Write The Slice at P. O. Box 2160, Spokane, WA 99210; call (509) 459-5470; email When schools allude to “early release” on their reader boards, Nick Suksdorf can’t help but think it sounds like they are corrections facilities.

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