August 27, 2013 in Features

The Slice: Do campers dream of electric blankets?

By The Spokesman-Review
 
The Spokesman-Review photo

Paul Turner, Spokesman-Review columnist.
(Full-size photo)

It has been suggested to me this summer that the dreams people have while camping tend to be unlike dreams experienced while sleeping at home.

I wouldn’t know. Last time I went camping, I kept thinking that I could not believe how cold it was at 3 a.m. But I’m pretty sure I was wide awake at the time.

Still, I would like to hear from readers. Are your camping dreams unlike your regular dreams? In what way? Please be specific. And do you have a theory about this?

Note to kids about to be first-graders: Sorry. Saying “I prefer not to” doesn’t work.

Rejected Pig Out In The Park pick-up lines: 1. “Got something in your teeth there.” 2. “May I use a napkin on your sauce-smeared face?” 3. “I think a piece of spicy chicken just disappeared into the depths of your decolletage.” 4. “Gonna finish that?” 5. “I go by Numchuk online but you can call me Slagpile.” 6. “The drip-stains on your T-shirt look like that lakes of the Inland Northwest art in the floor at River Park Square.” 7. “May I buy you a fish taco?” 8. “I’m personal friends with Jess Walter’s brother.” 9. “You are what you eat, baby.” 10. “If I hold your plate, would you wipe my chin?”

This date in Slice history (1996): What resident of either Spokane or Coeur d’Alene has gone the longest time without visiting the other city?

Today’s Slice question: The Slice has hosted multiple discussions over the years about the varied ways those hereabouts define “back East.” So let’s turn the tables. How do your friends and relatives in other parts of the country describe the Inland Northwest’s location? What language do they use to characterize our place on the map?

Do they say “the coast”? Do they refer to us being “in the Rockies”? “Near California”? Do they imply that we are right next to Seattle or just west of the Dakotas? Or had they heard that hilariously imprecise “biggest city between Seattle and Minneapolis” boast and assumed we were sort of confused about it ourselves?

Write The Slice at P. O. Box 2160, Spokane, WA 99210; call (509) 459-5470; email pault@spokesman.com. The Slice Blog at www.spokesman.com is closing in on 6,000 posts, several of which might theoretically be of interest to someone.

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