March 10, 2013 in Nation/World

Barbs on menu at Gridiron dinner

From Wire Reports
 

Obama
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President Barack Obama had a ready excuse for anyone who didn’t think he was funny enough at Saturday night’s Gridiron dinner in Washington: “My joke writers have been placed on furlough.”

Always a target for humorous barbs, the president tossed out a few of his own during the Gridiron Club and Foundation dinner, an annual event that features political leaders, journalists and media executives poking fun at each other.

The ambitions of 70-year-old Vice President Joe Biden? “Just the other day, I had to take Joe aside and say, ‘Joe, you are way too young to be the pope. You can’t do it. You got to mature a little bit,’ ” Obama said.

Obama also mocked criticism from some quarters that he takes time off from his job. “We face major challenges. March in particular is going to be full of tough decisions. But I want to assure you, I have my top advisers working around the clock. After all, my March Madness bracket isn’t going to fill itself out. And don’t worry – there is an entire team in the Situation Room as we speak, planning my next golf outing, right now at this moment.”

The dinner was the organization’s 128th since its founding in 1885. Minnesota Sen. Amy Klobuchar represented the Democrats while Louisiana Gov. Bobby Jindal cracked wise for the Republicans.

Klobuchar joked that Obama had aged in office. “His Secret Service name used to be ‘Renegade,’ ” she said. “Now it’s ‘50 Shades of Grey.’ ”

Osbourne says seizure a mystery

Kelly Osbourne says she had a seizure and doctors are trying to figure out why.

The 28-year-old TV personality posted a photo on Twitter late Thursday of an IV in her tattooed left arm. She thanked her fans for their “beautiful well wishes.”

Osbourne was hospitalized Thursday after collapsing on the set of E! network’s “Fashion Police,” where she serves as a panelist alongside Joan Rivers, Giuliana Rancic and George Kotsiopoulos.

Osbourne is the daughter of rocker Ozzy Osbourne and “The Talk” co-host Sharon Osbourne. She was profiled with her family on the MTV reality series “The Osbournes” and has appeared as a contestant on “Dancing with the Stars.”

The birthday bunch

Singer Dean Torrence (Jan and Dean) is 73. Actor Chuck Norris is 73. Actress Katharine Houghton is 68. Guitarist Tom Scholz (Boston) is 66. Actress Aloma Wright (“Scrubs”) is 63. Actress Sharon Stone is 55. Bassist Jeff Ament (Pearl Jam) is 50. Actor Jon Hamm (“Mad Men”) is 42. Rapper-producer Timbaland is 41. Singer Carrie Underwood is 30. Actress Olivia Wilde is 29. Singer Emeli Sande is 26. Actress Emily Osment is 21.


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