Dear Annie: I’ve been friendly with a neighbor for some time, as we are both cat owners. I recently let my cat outside briefly, and he came in limping as a result of a catfight. I immediately rushed him to my vet, who performed emergency surgery and presented me with a big bill.
When telling my neighbor of the expenses, he said I was foolish to have been so concerned about a cat. Annie, I was shocked to hear this from a fellow cat owner and have ceased speaking to him. He has made overtures toward friendship, and I’ve rebuffed him. Should I forgive and forget? – Cat Lover Ed
Dear Ed: No one expects you to agree with everything your friends think, do and say. Yes, we are surprised that a fellow cat owner would seem so callous. But this is essentially a difference of opinion about how much money one would spend on an animal’s treatment. If you think this comment means your neighbor is an unkind, nasty person, you don’t need to stay friends. But if he is otherwise a good guy and you miss his friendship, please forgive him.
Dear Annie: “Conflicted Adoptee in Kansas” was hurt that her biological mother didn’t want to tell her other grown children about her.
Three years ago, my 70-year-old grandmother walked over to my mother, handed her a piece of paper and said, “Well, you’ve always wanted a sister.” Grandma had given up a baby girl when Grandpa was still married to his first wife. When she became pregnant again (with my mother), they finally wed.
At first we were shocked. Grandma was ashamed and embarrassed. My mother was excited to get to know her new sister, but they discovered that they really don’t care much for each other. In fact, no one in the family likes her, but we feel obligated to be nice and polite.
Grandma refuses to talk about it. I completely understand why some things are better left alone. – Omaha, Neb.