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Breaking a heart can be unavoidable

Dear Annie: I am a boy in junior high school. I recently went to a social event for kids my age. While there, a girl spilled the beans that she has had a major crush on me for more than a year. We see each other often at school. I was shocked. She asked to hold my cellphone and then put her number into my contacts.

Here’s the problem. I don’t like this girl at all, but I’m getting tons of texts from her daily. No matter how hard I try to distance myself and let this one-sided relationship die, she keeps coming back.

Annie, I have tried not responding, deleting her from my contacts, etc. I don’t want to break her heart, because I’m not that kind of guy. This is the first time anything like this has happened to me, and it’s starting to stress me out. I’m having nightmares about her.

All advice from my parents to shake her has failed. Can you help? – Not a Heartbreaker

Dear Not: Sometimes you can’t avoid breaking a heart. Be kind, not cruel, and take solace in knowing you behaved like a gentleman. Tell this girl as kindly as possible that you aren’t interested in a romantic relationship. Say that you’re sorry things didn’t work out the way she wanted, but she must stop texting because it makes you feel that she is stalking you. You cannot control her response. She may cry, be angry or even continue to text. Do not respond. It will take a while before she gives up, so be sure not to give false encouragement by engaging her in conversation, even negatively. Be totally neutral and uninterested. And patient.

Annie’s Mailbox is written by Kathy Mitchell and Marcy Sugar, longtime editors of the Ann Landers column. Please email your questions to anniesmailbox@comcast. net, or write to: Annie’s Mailbox, in care of Creators Syndicate, 737 Third Street, Hermosa Beach, CA 90254.Visit the Creators Syndicate Web page at