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The Slice: Taking wildlife preservation to a whole new level

Thu., Oct. 10, 2013, midnight

Slice readers have varied responses to seeing dead squirrels.

“Any animal that dies anywhere around me gets a really good funeral ending with being buried under a perennial (to lessen the chances of being dug up later),” wrote Karen Ulmer.

Bob Brown went another route. “My wife and I literally scraped one off the Sixth and Walnut intersection, encased it in some clear resin, made a frame for it, and presented it to our nephew for Christmas as a road-kill cutting board. He still has it.”

Slice answer: “I keep a small notepad next to my recliner,” wrote Terry Martin. “When I see/hear about a movie that we might want to watch in the future, I write the name of the movie on the list.”

Pet-door training: “Place the animal’s nose on the door, and shove the doggy’s butt till the dog is through the door,” wrote Dennis DeMattia. “With three different dogs, it only took twice for them to figure it out.”

The pooches in question are Chihuahuas and the door was sized for them. “We boarded a border collie, which is about 10 times the size of the little dogs, and it figured it out all by himself – even though he had to squeeze through the door like an Army recruit going under barbed wire.

“What we don’t understand is how our cat can sit there and look at the mutts doing this, but she has not tried it herself. She will try every trick to get out the main door when it’s open, though.”

Slice answer (re: kids selling stuff by the grocery store entrance): “I always buy, from hucksters and shufflers alike,” wrote Ashley Steinhart. “These are kiddos learning to earn their way toward something they want! Overpriced popcorn is a community investment in the next generation’s work ethic. Plus, I owe a Karmic debt to this city for the 10,000 or so boxes of Campfire mints I sold here as a child.”

Today’s Slice question: If you got to be hugely famous and eventually tourists coming here could take guided tours highlighting your “Spokane years,” what stops would the tour bus make?

Write The Slice at P.O. Box 2160, Spokane, WA 99210; call (509) 459-5470; email One of Tim O’Doherty’s touch-football rules: “No swearing or pot; beer is allowed.”

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