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The Slice: Boy sees clear-cut path to future

Mon., Oct. 14, 2013

Diana Witherspoon’s 7-year-old son has made his choice.

Collecting firewood is preferable to hanging out with girls.

Michael, who enjoys spending time in the woods with his dad, was riding in the car with his mom last week when they drove by some teenage boys and girls congregated outside a library. That’s when he volunteered his perspective on life and love.

“I think logging is a lot better than dating,” he said.

Spoken like a true son of the Northwest.

His reasoning? No mushy kissing. No hugging involved.

Case closed. He’s a lumberjack and he’s OK.

Will Michael stand by that policy? The Slice will have to check back in about five years.

Maybe he’ll still be a dedicated young woodsman, eschewing the distracting lure of feminine charms.

Perhaps he will not find himself captivated by the musical sound of a girl’s laugh or feel an odd stirring at the sight of a beguiling smile and wonder why a fleeting moment of eye contact has him hypnotized.

Or maybe he’ll meet a girl who likes collecting firewood and change his tune.

Dave’s not here, man: Thanks for the early entries in The Slice’s Autumn Leaves Contest. I have received some fine photos. And one thoughtful reader mailed me what appear to be marijuana leaves.

The submission deadline is Nov. 1.

The Slice had asked readers about their attention spans: “Could you repeat the question?” wrote Terry Kolemaine.

“Shorter than a gnat’s inseam,” said Krista Fretheim. “Wait, what did you ask?”

“What was it?” wrote Carl Eklund.

Warm-up questions: If you are a snowbird, what steps do you take to reduce the likelihood that you will spend much of the winter worrying about the possibility of burglars breaking into your place up here? In the Spokane area at least, do the people who work at credit unions tend to be better-looking than those who work at banks? Did you ever say “groovy”?

Today’s Slice question: Ever noticed that there are places in the Palouse from which you can view Mount Spokane in the distance without seeing a single sign of all the people who live in between?

Write The Slice at P. O. Box 2160, Spokane, WA 99210; call (509) 459-5470; email People are disease vectors.

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