The Slice: Some of us let our trash do the talking

I’m stealing this from The Slice Blog, but what the heck.

When surveying post-winter litter in springtime Spokane, do you find yourself drawing a series of unflattering conclusions about local trash-tossers?

Sure, they get an automatic thumbs-down simply because they litter, a truly brainless act. But do you also make inferences about the way they eat, drink and generally conduct their lives (see: packaging for various moronic products)?

Let’s move on.

Potential new car models named after local parks: “Ford Farragut.” – Tammy Tracy

“Mitsubishi Minnehaha.” – Ron Lugone

Today’s pen-pal story: “My dad was a ham radio operator,” wrote my friend Judy McKeehan. “When he was in high school he subscribed to a ham operator magazine and found a fellow operator in Paris (my dad was from Indiana) whose name (Gerard Haas) was close to his (Garland Haas) and they became pen pals.

“When we moved to Pakistan in 1959 we got to meet Gerard for the first time. He told my dad that, during the war (he was a newspaper correspondent), he was captured by the Nazis. Because he bore such a strong resemblance to my dad in a snapshot he had, and because you could read the license plate on the car my dad was standing next to, he convinced the Nazis that he was an American and was released.”

Grilled cheese or toasted: “Must be grilled, definitely,” said Janet Culbertson. “With dill pickles. Yum.”

“Toasted,” said Jill Johnson.

“These are two completely different types of sandwiches at our house,” said Diane Rowland-Johnson.

If high schools had crowned a “Truck Queen” back in the day: Her duties would have consisted of presiding over the truck washing after off-road events, said Gary Polser.

How to know your car’s interior has gone from being messy to being a garbage scow: The second discarded banana peel is the tip-off, said Greg Staples.

Today’s Slice question: How should I spend or invest my income tax refund?

It’s going to be $5.

Write The Slice at P.O. Box 2160, Spokane, WA 99210; call (509) 459-5470; email pault@spokesman.com. Finish this sentence: “Don’t come crying to me when …”

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