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Annie’s Mailbox: Dad mad daughters not on wedding list

Thu., July 3, 2014

Dear Annie: My brother’s daughter is getting married this summer. She’s having a huge wedding. All of the nieces, nephews and cousins are invited except our three daughters. My brother said they have to cut somewhere.

Should I just shrug this off? I told my mother that I’m so upset, I’m thinking of never seeing or speaking to my brother again. Is this a feeling I should be having? Should I ask my brother what we did to them that they would exclude us in this way? – Not a Happy Sister

Dear Sister: Generally, it is wise to “cut” along the same family lines, so that, for example, you invite all first cousins or none of them. However, sometimes the bride or groom has a close relationship with some cousins and not others. In such cases, if the guest list is limited, it makes sense to invite those with whom you are closest. Is it possible that your children are especially distant from the bride? Have they had a falling out of which you are unaware? Unless there is a reason, we find this exclusion unnecessarily hurtful. We hope you can work through it.

Dear Annie: “Disgusted in N.Y.” said her 85-year-old aunt never had a bath in the six weeks she spent in the hospital. There is evidence not to bathe hospital patients using plastic tubs due to increased infection rates when tubs are not disinfected sufficiently between uses.

As a result, many hospitals have adopted the use of prepackaged disposable bath wipes. Often these are warmed and feel good to the patient, and it cleans them. Perhaps the hospital needs to investigate using these wipes. – Pennsylvania Nurse

Annie’s Mailbox is written by Kathy Mitchell and Marcy Sugar, longtime editors of the Ann Landers column. Please email your questions to anniesmailbox@


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