Arrow-right Camera
Subscribe now

This column reflects the opinion of the writer. Learn about the differences between a news story and an opinion column.

The Slice: When they say ‘be prepared,’ they aren’t kidding around

My friend Hank Greer shared a story that made me laugh.

“Your bit about ‘thong’ in today’s Slice reminded me of when I was joining the Boy Scouts as an 11-year-old back in ’68,” he wrote. “I was memorizing everything I needed to know to become a Tenderfoot and stopped when I reviewed what was needed when camping. Along with hatchet, knife, and rope, ‘rubbers’ was on the list. That confused me very much. Why would you need rubbers when camping? Unless …

“My dad was not an easy man to talk to so I had to approach him carefully about it. I showed him the list and asked if I really needed all these things for camping. He looked at it and said, ‘Yep.’

“I went back to my room and pondered this. My 11-year-old mind was racing with all kinds of thoughts. Things like the Girl Scouts were involved, and this must be best kept secret in the world.

“But I had to make sure so I went back to dad and asked him if he was sure I needed everything on the list. He said I did, so I asked, ‘What are the rubbers for?’ ”

Hank’s dad had an answer: “In case it rains.”

“My face scrunched up in puzzlement at that strange response and his eyes widened in horror as it suddenly dawned on him what his boy was thinking.”

Hank’s dad said, “They’re galoshes, you dummy!”

Oh.

“Not long after that my parents handed me a pamphlet titled, ‘Doctor Talks to 9-12 Year Olds.’ ”

Slice answers: “I’d name my ice cream ‘Pink Martini’ after my nickname and adult drink of choice,” wrote Janet “Pinki” Culbertson. “The ingredients are obvious.”

Rosemary Daniel would go for ice cream that recalled the flavor of fountain cherry Cokes served at The Crescent department store.

And since the whole thing is theoretical, it’s probably OK that the actors John Petrofski selected to play him in a movie are dead. He would want Dom DeLuise to play him as a younger man and then Sebastian Cabot to portray him later in life.

Today’s Slice question: Ever get a glimpse at your scholastic permanent record?

Write The Slice at P. O. Box 2160, Spokane, WA 99210; call (509) 459-5470; email pault@spokesman.com. Everyone should see the first half-hour of “Saving Private Ryan.”

More from this author