Couch Slouch revisits Phil Jackson-Jeanie Buss marriage

Hidden in plain sight, the most powerful power couple in American sports lives under the same roof, travel considerations notwithstanding.

Jeanie Buss is president of the Los Angeles Lakers and fiancé Phil Jackson is president of the New York Knicks. Whether they are in the same bed or in different arenas, this constitutes a massive conflict of interest that the NBA seems untroubled by.

It is a latter-day Mary Matalin/James Carville sleeping-with-the-enemy circumstance – by day they try to outmaneuver each other, by night they lovingly gaze at NBA League Pass.

What a bizarre life Buss and Jackson lead: They make all their dinner reservations for 7:35 p.m. and incorporate TV timeouts into their romantic interludes.

However, on any given evening, the Lakers are the worst team in the West and the Knicks are the worst team in the East, perhaps putting an additional strain on the bicoastal, bi-court relationship. But as we saw last year through the confidential texts we exclusively published, these two have a strong bond; this year, Couch Slouch presents the Jeanie Buss-Phil Jackson letters, unedited:

Dear Phil – I’m not entirely comfortable with it, but after further consideration I’ve decided to defer to your wisdom and will stick to our new policy of letting all Mark Cuban phone calls go straight to voice mail.

Dear Jeanie – I had to move to NYC to appreciate why Kobe takes a helicopter from Newport Beach to Staples Center for every game. No more A train for me to the Garden – it took forever, people smell like day-old garbage and everyone’s reading the tabloids.

Dear Phil – David Stern blocked the Chris Paul-to- the-Lakers deal three years ago because it wasn’t in the league’s best interest, I guess. Well, how does having Wayne Ellington, Jordan Clarkson and Ronnie Price in our backcourt in the league’s best interest?

Dear Jeanie – By the way, you try working on salary cap issues when your boss is strumming a guitar all day in the next office.

Dear Phil – Please. Let me tell you how dumb my brother Jim is. True story: He went to jockey school when he was 20 – and he’s 6 foot 2!

Dear Jeanie – Watching Carmelo Anthony on film doesn’t allow you to fully appreciate the size of his head.

Dear Phil – It might be an odd way out for you, but why don’t you double-check if Melo actually signed his $124 million contract?

Dear Jeanie – I’d also like to run J.R. Smith out of here on a rail, but I don’t think he could find his way to the station unless you put a basket in front of Grand Central.

Dear Phil – Oh, stop whining. You get to play the 76ers four times; we only play them twice.

Dear Jeanie – That blowhard Spike Lee cornered me pregame in the tunnel the other night and explained why the triangle offense has racist overtones.

Dear Phil – One other thing about my brother Jim – he saw James Worthy last night two hours before tipoff and asked how much longer he thought he’d be sidelined.

Dear Jeanie – I’d never say it publicly – boy oh boy, they’d run me up the flagpole on talk radio – but it looks like Steve Kerr made the right call when he turned me down last May.

Dear Phil – I was just going through the books and noticed that Jack Nicholson hasn’t paid his season-ticket bill since 1997. God, I’m tired of being the bad cop around here.

Dear Jeanie – You just gave me a great idea: Maybe if I double the price of Spike Lee’s floor seat, he’ll start going to Nets games.

Dear Phil – In my honest opinion, if we both tank at the same time, I think it decreases the chances any media bloodhounds detect that either one of us is tanking.

Dear Jeanie – I think I left the water running in the hot tub in Montana. Can you have the au pair check on it?

Dear Phil – How come every medical marijuana dispensary in L.A. has us on their call list?

Ask The Slouch

Q. After losing to Oregon, Florida State’s Jameis Winston tweeted, “What an amazing year we still will have the same # of Ls as the champ #LMAO.” Are you surprised he got the math right? (Bill Compton; Albany, New York)

A. Winston actually reminded me of the fact that in 1983, the Houston men’s basketball team had seven fewer losses than national champion N.C. State, and in 1985 Georgetown also had seven fewer losses than national champion Villanova. #LMAO

Q. At times, I am embarrassed to admit that I am more knowledgeable about sports than any other subject and wonder whether you ever have similar feelings? (Howard Walderman; Columbia, Md.)

A. You may have noticed I am not easily embarrassed.

Q. So Ndamukong Suh had cold feet? (Josh Lipman; Spokane)

A. I can think of at least a couple of times in my life I should’ve used that one.

Q. In the NFL, when a wide-open receiver headed for the end zone is tackled from behind, why isn’t the defender penalized for a clear-path foul? (Dan Neukam; Las Vegas)

A. Pay the man, Shirley.