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The Slice: Getting on board with “Thanksgiving travelers”

Let’s check in on our old pals, the “Thanksgiving travelers.”

If we search the S-R’s electronic archives for that exact expression, what do we find?

Well, we discover that “Thanksgiving travelers scrambled to book earlier flights to avoid a sprawling storm bearing down on the East Coast.”

Isn’t there always a sprawling storm bearing down on the East Coast? And just what are the chances there are going to be open seats on earlier flights?

We read that the intrepid TT “Will fight for overhead bins and go hours without a snack or room to stretch.”

Would you call those FirstWorld problems? Oh, the humanity! Hours without a snack.

Actually, on second thought, that does sound rather grim.

Then we learned that they “Easily walked through the checkpoint, a randomly selected few stepping into the body scanner.”

Not exactly over the river and through the woods, but holiday spirit has to allow for reality.

We also read that “Thanksgiving travelers will encounter mild weather in North Idaho, Washington and Western Montana for the next several days.”

Of course, that was in 1997, so it might be wise to check more recent forecasts.

But some of the adventures of “Thanksgiving travelers” are essentially timeless.

“Thanksgiving travelers were urged to get to the airport earlier this year.”

What year was that? Does it really matter?

If you are the designated adult assigned to sit at the children’s table Thursday: Try to keep the following in mind.

1. Protect your eyes.

2. A parent might tell a kid that threatening to stab a tablemate with a fork “Is not how we behave” but seeing is believing.

3. Saying “I didn’t start it” will not absolve you of responsibility for a food fight that has your nephews screaming “He’s in the kill box – finish him!”

4. Choose apparel that resembles the color of gravy.

The Slice question from this date in 1994: Which movie title best reflects your experience in the Inland Northwest?

A) “The Best Years of Our Lives.” B) “Kitten With a Whip.” C) “Son of Flubber.” D) “Sometimes a Great Notion.” E) “The Great Escape.” F) “The Good the Bad and the Ugly.” G) “Dazed and Confused.”

Today’s Slice question: Will electronic devices be banned at your dinner table Thursday?

Write The Slice at P. O. Box 2160, Spokane, WA 99210; call (509) 459-5470; email pault@spokesman.com. Can a cooked turkey be referred to as “roast beast,” or does that pertain only to Seussian animals found near Whoville closer to Christmas?

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