Left-out girlfriend should just speak up

Dear Annie: I live in the same town as two friends from high school. One of these friends married right out of high school and starting having children. My other friend and I both went to college together, and then she married and started her family. Neither of these women had a career outside the home. I worked in a professional capacity until retirement, and I did not have children.

We are now in our 60s. I love both these ladies. Here’s the problem: When I am with either friend individually, they will talk about a variety of topics. However, when we get together as a threesome, these two talk about their children or grandchildren, and I am left out. Changing the subject doesn’t work, and I don’t like being third wheel.

Any suggestions on how to deal with this matter would be appreciated. – Left Out

Dear Left Out: You’ve known these women for decades. It’s OK to be frank. The next time you get together, say, “You have five minutes to discuss your kids. I’m happy to know what’s going on with your families. But more than that leaves me out. We have so many other things to talk about. OK?”

Dear Annie: This is in reply to “Nervous Nellie,” whose fiance never stops looking at other women.

Twenty five years ago, I was in the same situation. After seeing my fiance make eye contact with other women numerous times, I had enough.

One day we were in a supermarket aisle, when, as I turned to him, I saw he was ogling a woman in the checkout line. She was returning his smile. I whispered in his ear, “If you EVER do that again, I will yell as loudly as I can that you are impotent and unemployed, and she can have you if she wants.” (Part of that was true.) He knew I meant it and the behavior ceased.

Nonetheless, within months I decided I didn’t need the loser and broke our engagement. But that incident is still a sweet memory. – Empowered