The Slice: Contemplating the snowblower imperative

Skiers are not the only ones in the Spokane area praying for snow.

Those who have recently purchased snowblowers also hope we get dumped on.

Oh, sure. They might deny it. But if you have a new toy, you want to use it.

Sorry. Meant to say “tool.” A new tool.

Anyway, I’m not badmouthing anybody. Before my late parents moved from Vermont to an assisted living facility in Spokane in 2000, my dad used to speak in epic terms about using his snowblower.

He had a Toro, though he referred to it as though that were its name.

To listen to him talk about the battles he and Toro fought against northern New England blizzards was to hear a satisfied man.

So far as I know, he never looked to the gray wintertime sky above Lake Champlain and said “Bring it on!” But when needed, he and Toro would answer the bell. He would yank the starter cord, listen to the engine roar and lean into the wind.

“On, Toro! On, boy!”

I suspect it’s that way with a lot of recent converts to the church of snow removal.

Look at it this way. You invest in one of these machines. You find a place to park it in your garage. Then you wait.

Wouldn’t you eventually want to try it out?

Oh, sure. I suppose it wouldn’t be logical to root for snow if you are worried about driving conditions. But if your immediate focus is your driveway and sidewalk, the urge to fire up your new machine would be understandable.

And from what I gather, some of these devices are a pleasure to use.

Just about every winter, readers tell me “good neighbor” stories about men who own snowblowers selflessly clearing the driveways of others.

That’s fine. I have no doubt the gentlemen in question are good guys, deserving of praise.

But let’s be honest. In at least a few instances, these neighborhood heroes are doing something they enjoy.

Yes, using a snowblower is work. But it is satisfying work.

You can see what you have accomplished. When you’re done, you can trudge inside, shuck off your coat and hat, pour a sip of something to revive you, and then tell the story (being sure to include your steadfast snowblower in the tale of your adventure).

“There we were…”

Today’s Slice question: What was the No. 2 retirement destination choice for Air Force retirees who wound up in Spokane?

Write The Slice at P. O. Box 2160, Spokane, WA 99210; call (509) 459-5470; email pault@spokesman.com. Annual reminder: Don’t buy Northwest calendars that ignore the Inland Northwest.