The Slice: Going yard: Time for another Slice contest

Welcome to The Slice’s Best Backyard Contest.

If you are declared the winner, I will come hang out in your backyard for a little while sometime before the first official day of summer. Maybe enjoy a cold beverage.

Are you tingling with excitement yet? I know I am.

Here’s how to enter. Answer the following questions and email me a photo or photos of your backyard. Nothing could be simpler.

OK, I’m not looking for the biggest. I’m not seeking the most attractively landscaped. I’m just looking for the best backyard, a standard I freely admit drips with subjectivity.

Let’s get started.

If you were to evaluate your backyard the way Linus in “Peanuts” looked at pumpkin patches – in terms of sincerity – how would it fare?

How many times has your backyard been the scene of nude swimming?

What wildlife have you observed back there?

What are the Wiffle ball ground rules particular to your property?

Have little kids ever camped out in your backyard and succeeded in making it through the night?

Does your backyard sometimes smell like the ghost of a thousand cookouts?

Is your backyard mostly a backdrop for your deck?

Do you have a garden back there?

What’s the yellow jacket situation?

How would you rate your backyard when it comes to stargazing?

Any family dogs buried back there?

Have you acquired any lawn furniture since “The Jetsons” was new?

Does croquet at your house ever resemble an ill-tempered hockey game?

Is there a treehouse on the premises?

Can any people who are now adults recall making out back there as teens?

If we had lightning bugs out here, would they like your backyard?

Can you walk around barefoot without risk of lacerations?

Did your backyard ever have a tiki torch phase?

Are any of your dreams ever set in your backyard?

The title of which “Calvin & Hobbes” collection best describes your backyard?

Do neighborhood cats regard your backyard as a crossroad, in a Delta blues sense?

Anyone ever put on a play or staged a concert back there?

Why is yours arguably the quintessential Inland Northwest backyard?

Today’s Slice question: When you leave Spokane, how long does it take you to get homesick?

Write The Slice at P.O. Box 2160, Spokane, WA 99210; call (509) 459-5470; email pault@spokesman.com. One of my favorite Slice items was a 2005 story about confusion ensuing after a 4-year-old boy said he had bumped his “foreskin” when he meant “forehead.”