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The Spokesman-Review Newspaper
Spokane, Washington  Est. May 19, 1883

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Early morning reverie and shots at life…

Good morning, Netizens...

Dave wanders back in the doorway of the Virtual Ballroom, now eager for a hot Virtual Espresso after an early-morning do-or-die rescue mission for a client, and after answering a few messages, I sidle down by where our barrista, Juan Gomez, is peering with a beatific smile at this mornings rendition of Virtual Espresso named morning meadowlark. According to Juan, this fine virtual espresso, when suitably imbibed, will temporarily render those who drink it capable of beautifully singing any song of their choosing. Hey, after all, this is a Virtual Ballroom, right? The meadowlark picture is courtesy of Wikipedia.

Come to think of it, I did notice a few of the ghosts wandering around the Grand Ballroom a moment ago warbling some old Broadway Show Tunes, but when you are a ghost, you often do things out of sequence.

On my way to my Virtual Bar Stool, I grab a copy of the morning news hot off the tin can telegraph. According to Reuters, The Senate Intelligence Committee (isn't that a misappropriation of the English language?) has discovered that Bush's administration "led the nation to war on false premises," said the committee's Democratic Chairman, Sen. John Rockefeller of West Virginia. Several Republicans on the committee protested its findings as a "partisan exercise." Several of the Democrats on the committee ostensibly then banged their beer mugs on the podium, calling the Republican Committee members liars and malcontents. As word of this news spread throughout the Grand Ballroom, a group collectively known as “The Virtual Singers”, no doubt impressed with this morning's espresso blend, burst into anti-war songs, banging their espresso cups on the bar for emphasis.

Some local youngster is in jail this morning on a charge of committing bad math. He spent $100 for a color printer and paper to make bogus $10 bills so he could buy $90 worth of pot. After he gets out of jail, aren't they going to send him away for Math lessons?

The number of mortgage foreclosures and payment delinquencies set records over the first three months of the year, and are expected to continue rising. At this rate, pretty soon I'll be able to lease out space to renters in my aging, sagging-on-its-springs motorhome, Beulah the Wandering Road Hog parked out back since at $4 a gallon, who can afford to drive it?

BREAKING NEWS The Mars Lander has been told to start digging up dirt. Oh, wait a minute. Both Presidential campaigns are already doing that. Never mind.

Question of the morning is, if you could be someone else in life, other than being fabulously and independently wealthy, who would you be?


Spokesman-Review readers blog about news and issues in Spokane written by Dave Laird.