Root for the Los Angeles Dodgers: Because of that team's Spokane connection going back to shortly after the Earth's crust cooled.
Root for the Houston Astros: Because of the hurricane caused flood.
Root for the Dodgers: Because you do not approve of the DH.
Root for the Astros: Because you are an old gun nut who remembers when they were called the Colt 45s.
Root for the Dodgers: Because, like every other person on your block, you are from southern California.
Root for the Astros: Because you like seeing Justin Verlander's girlfriend on TV.