Arrow-right Camera
The Spokesman-Review Newspaper
Spokane, Washington  Est. May 19, 1883

The Slice When Will Birkenstock Start Making Two-Tone Golf Shoes?

Paul Turner Staff Writer

Said it before and we’ll say it again.

The Spokane area has to lead the nation in the percentage of former counterculture types who are now addicted to golf.

Facing up to it: “The other day I gave my 3-year-old son, Dustin, a piece of turkey. He informed me ‘I need a big piece cuz I got a big face.’ He then went on to explain that Dillon, his 20-month-old brother, needs a little piece, ‘Cuz his face is little.’ Then he told me ‘Mommy needs a big one cuz your face is big.”’ - Spokane’s Brenda Buckingham, “Dustin’s Big Faced Mommy” One definition of Inland

One definition of Inland Northwest hell: Having get-a-life neighbors who constantly scrutinize your lawn maintenance program.

One definition of Inland Northwest heaven: Having got-a-life neighbors who don’t consider themselves one of the community’s founding families because they moved here six months before you.

Overheard: “As I was standing in the checkout line at Home Base on Sprague, I overheard another customer asking where a particular item might be found,” wrote R.S. from the South Hill. “The clerk cheerfully responded that the item was on aisle 37. The customer looked around, thanked the clerk, and then asked ‘On which side of Freya is that?”’

Overheard at a Spokane drugstore: Man: “You have to stay with me. You know I need you to help me find things.”

Young child: “Yeah, you don’t even know where the bathroom is.” - submitted by Margie Shepherd, who was in the next aisle

Warm-up question: How can you tell that someone is engaging in wishful thinking when describing his or her endurance as a hiker?

Today’s Slice question: When did discussions of dilation and other rather clinical physical assessments become standard parts of casual workplace conversations about coworkers who are about to give birth?

xxxx