She Wouldn’t Be The First Daughter To Dis Her Dad
Call it Chelseagate.
It began in December with a satirical piece in the weekly New York Press, where Tom Gogola wrote of an alleged tape recording by Chelsea Clinton in which she blasted her father, sang a propot anthem and commented on presidential nemesis Paula Jones.
When news outlets asked for copies, Gogola and a female friend recorded a bogus tape that started making the media rounds, prompting the White House to demand that the hoaxers come clean.
“I was just baffled that people would believe it because it was just so over the top,” Gogola said.
Added Press editor Russ Smith: “You’d have to be pretty stupid not to realize it was satire, but a lot of people were stupid.”
Loose talk
Jay Leno, on Gennifer Flowers’ claims in her new book that Bill Clinton was a great lover: “That’s got to be very frustrating for President Clinton. The first time in two years that anybody’s written anything nice about him, and now he has to deny it.”
God bless him, because he’s got his own
Florida Gov. Lawton Chiles turns 65 today.
And we think we’re going to be violently ill
Gennifer Flowers, defending “Passion and Betrayal” to the Los Angeles press: “This was not a book written in hate, but rather love. Bill Clinton will always have a piece of my soul, and I’ll never love someone again the way I loved Bill Clinton. I think I’m going to cry now.”
Send in the clowns? Don’t bother, they’re here
Perennial presidential hopeful Pat Paulsen has announced his fourth campaign for the nation’s highest office. Says the 68-year-old comedian: “I’ll be running against Clinton. I think I have a chance.”
He gets his economic forecasts there, too
While Beatles and Bobby Darin tunes blasted from the jukebox, the president put away a Diet Coke and an order of “neutron fries” at Stella’s Blue Sky Diner during his trip to Des Moines last week. Vice President Al Gore opted for a chocolate banana shake.
We hear Socks is already starting to weaken
After 26 openly gay Clinton administration officials posed for a photo that ran in Out magazine, Jerry Falwell photocopied it and send it out in fund-raising letters for his Liberty Alliance with the message: “Don’t be fooled by their conservative appearance! Their hidden agenda is to FORCE America to accept their deviant homosexual lifestyle.”
Which should go over great in the ‘hood
David Duke, considering another run for Louisiana governor, outlined this platform plank in the gay mag the Advocate: “There needs to be some way we can protect people from sexual relations with AIDS carriers. So this may sound very draconian, but I’ll tell you what I’d do: I believe in the indelible, unwashable AIDS tattoo. It would be placed in the private area, maybe even with glow-in-the-dark ink.”
The following fields overflowed: CREDIT = Compiled by staff writer Rick Bonino