Strikes Affect Workers’ Children Too Parents Advised To Explain What’s Happening To Kids

Boeing machinists have had a month to think about why they’re on strike and how they’ll juggle their finances until it’s over. And so have their children.

Parents may be startled to find that even though they explained to their children what was happening at the onset of the strike, the children may still be concerned about their safety, comfort and care, said Judith Cohen, a clinical psychologist at the Clinic for Counseling and Psychotherapy in Federal Way.

“Children may continue to have questions later even though (parents) think they’ve already discussed this because children have a different time table,” Cohen said. “Let your children know that you are willing and able to answer any questions they may have.”

Cohen recommends that parents be as honest about what it means to be on strike, including its financial consequences, as the child’s age and character permits.

“Without information from their parents, children will fill in the blanks with their own fears and their own fantasies,” Cohen said.

Crisis counselor Holly Baker said she’s armed with the same advice for strikers at the International Association of Machinists and Aerospace Workers Union in Auburn.

“Communication is the main thing,” Baker said. “Children know when something is going on, even if parents try to hide it.”

And parents seem to be heeding the advice.

Striker Brian Carter said his two young daughters have strong personalities so he and his wife aren’t shy about answering their questions. But he doesn’t want to overwhelm them either.

“They want to know what a strike is so I tried to explain about the union and the contract,” Carter said. “We let them know what’s going on, but we try not to talk about it too much.”

Sitting next to her father in the union hall, Carter’s 9-year-old daughter, Whitney, smiled at her dad.

“My dad has (explained) but I don’t really understand,” she said.

Cohen said one of the most obvious and significant ways a strike affects a child is the increased presence at home of a parent who usually is at work.

“Predictability, consistency, those are important parts of a child’s world,” Cohen said. “They may not be accustomed to dad taking an interest in their homework or mom being at home in the morning.”

Whitney agreed. “It took some getting used to,” the youngster said.

Parents may also want to prepare their children now for a different kind of holiday season this year, Cohen said.

“Yes, it is a change,” Cohen said. “It’s much more pleasant to have lots of presents, but just because it’s different doesn’t mean it’s worse.”

Carter acknowledged there won’t be as many presents under the Christmas tree in his house this year, but Whitney didn’t flinch. The father focused on all the relatives with whom they’ll be sharing the holidays, and Whitney seemed excited at the prospect of celebrating with her grandparents.

Whitney was waiting at the union hall to go to the picket line with her dad because she’s curious. Cohen said satisfying children’s curiosity is a strong reason to let them visit.

“Children want to visit for the same reason they may want to visit a parent’s workplace - to see what mommy and daddy do and how they do it,” Cohen said. “If it’s a hostile environment, of course, you don’t want to expose your child to that. But if there’s a lot of profanity or argumentative behavior … that can happen at a baseball game.”

Cohen said a child’s experience of a strike depends on the parent’s experience. If a parent is coping well, so will his or her child. But if a parent is depressed or acts guilty, she said, that will be the child’s experience.

“Children take their cues from their parents,” Cohen said.